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d20

Canada

Member Since 2003

Followers 271 Following 156

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Tuesday Oct 14, 2008

Oct 13, 2008
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but you are, my love, the astronaut.

pretentious lyric quote quota satisfied.

being here for so long has an effect on me sometimes. i look back through all my journals here and wonder who i was. i think about what i remember as having mattered to me back then then see i what i actually wrote about and it's so different. am i really that flippant about everything?

i wrote about world of warcraft like a thousand times but not once did i actually say how much i missed sougwen when she moved to new york. really?

the most traumatic breakup i ever went through was documented here as a series of vague i-miss-yous and talk about what to do about the cats.

the past year and a half has changed my whole life -- remade me entirely -- and i haven't once said her name. do any of you know her name? i can only think of two people who would. she's a pillar, and you don't know her at all.

is that really me? reading it all back now that it isn't me anymore makes me feel like i really was an asshole. how could anyone have gotten a solid grip on such a blunt face?

bah. it makes me want to delete it all, and it makes me want to record every day. i think i'll likely end up somewhere in the middle.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
desdemonia:
I actually looked back on all my entries and wish I had wrote about what was really going on, instead of shadowing them in nonsense entries that only they would know what it meant. Hyper coded, I suppose.

Dont delete it all... you need it to remind you to feel this way.
Oct 17, 2008
acet:
This must be tons of fun for you right now.

ooo aaa
Oct 18, 2008

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