I don't know what to say or what to do right now. 
I've been really good with my depression and handling it and not lettingit control me. Latelly though.. especially today .. its fucking tearing me in half.. I am using like all my energy to NOT cry right now... if you read my last blog yo know to a degree what is bothering me..... i just want to be held right now i.... i want to scream and cry and .... in the end i want to know i am still loved and cared for. ..... i need love and not sex.. and not even like LOVE just someone who cares for and about me to hold me and listen to me or talk to me or.... anything........ i dont know what to do 
I've been really good with my depression and handling it and not lettingit control me. Latelly though.. especially today .. its fucking tearing me in half.. I am using like all my energy to NOT cry right now... if you read my last blog yo know to a degree what is bothering me..... i just want to be held right now i.... i want to scream and cry and .... in the end i want to know i am still loved and cared for. ..... i need love and not sex.. and not even like LOVE just someone who cares for and about me to hold me and listen to me or talk to me or.... anything........ i dont know what to do VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
what i'm getting at is this - you may need to be psychologically evaluated if you're forever sad and crying. not that i'm a huge advocate of being medicated, but maybe you have a legitimate reason for being sad. i was told i have a "brain disorder." don't know what the fuck that means, but I guess I'm a little different from other people.
on the other hand, you may just be exhibiting all the classic signs of your humanhood - people NEED to be loved. it's a basic instinct. but answer me this: do you love yourself first? if you don't, how can you expect others to love you completely? love attracts love so LOVE YOURSELF FIRST!! look at your beautiful self in the mirror and proudly proclaim: I LOVE ME!!
after 34 years on this Earth, I can finally honestly say that I love myself. give it a try, okay?
Breathe, don't beat yourself up for feeling this way....
I know it's hard, but remember - if it's any consolation - you're not alone in this.