Today was my dad's birthday, so Matt, Ashley, my brother, and I went to my dad's grave. We sat down and smoked a cigarette while Ash and I made daisy chains to decorate his grave stone with. I am proud of the way I handled myself today. I wasn't sure how I was going to do, if I was going to break down or if I'd be okay. I only cried once, briefly, when Ashley hugged me. We went to the young people's NA meeting in Redwood. Was a good meeting. Spoke briefly about higher power, and how I don't particularly have one. That I just pray to a wall or my shoe or whatever. That the point is that I can turn my will over, that not everything is about what I want. That sometimes, I've got to depend on things/people other than myself.
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