that picture is misleading. my eyes aren't really blue.
so as part of the ongoing university disciplinary action against me for my unrepentent use of marijuana (or really, my unrepentent stupidity for getting caught) I received a life-awakening pamphlet from a certain sercretive organization that uses a series of ascending steps to transform and restore and its initiates. No, its not the Masons (those guys kicked me out when I told them my mom was asian), but a funny little program called Marijuana Anonymous, founded "in theory" by AA Architect Bill W. The pamphlet explains that the eclectic Bill helped build MA's twelve step program, but instead of giving you those twelve steps we are given "The Twelve Traditions of Marijuana Anonymous," a set of principles compiling the mystifying doctrine of this group. For example:
2. For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority, a loving God whose expression may come through in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.
This one's okay I guess, besides the fact that those same words have probably been written in every single cult recruitment pamphlet ever made, right next to the clause about renouncing your worldly possessions (and genitals). I think Bill must've lit up a doob around #3, or I had to, because his principles soon start becoming confused and paradoxical:
4. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or MA as a whole.
In other words, in dealing with issues each group should be independent of all other groups except when it is not independent of other groups.
8. MA should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers.
Just not professionally special.
9. MA, as such, ought never be organized, but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.
This one's my favorite. Leave it to a born-again christianizing stoner organization to have as a fundamental principle the refusal to organize.
10. MA has no opinion on outside issues; hence the MA name ought never be drawn into public controversy.
Remember, thinking for yourself is what made you start smoking in the first place!
Anyways, while I got a kick out of it, I don't think I'll be joining. Besides, they gave me a helpful little excerpt of the format of their meetings:
"We who are marijuana addicts know the answer to this question: Marijuana controls our lives! We lose interest in all else; our dreams go up in smoke... Our lives, our thinking, and our desires center around Marijuana - scoring it, dealing it, and finding ways to stay high."
That last sentence is my new mantra.
so as part of the ongoing university disciplinary action against me for my unrepentent use of marijuana (or really, my unrepentent stupidity for getting caught) I received a life-awakening pamphlet from a certain sercretive organization that uses a series of ascending steps to transform and restore and its initiates. No, its not the Masons (those guys kicked me out when I told them my mom was asian), but a funny little program called Marijuana Anonymous, founded "in theory" by AA Architect Bill W. The pamphlet explains that the eclectic Bill helped build MA's twelve step program, but instead of giving you those twelve steps we are given "The Twelve Traditions of Marijuana Anonymous," a set of principles compiling the mystifying doctrine of this group. For example:
2. For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority, a loving God whose expression may come through in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.
This one's okay I guess, besides the fact that those same words have probably been written in every single cult recruitment pamphlet ever made, right next to the clause about renouncing your worldly possessions (and genitals). I think Bill must've lit up a doob around #3, or I had to, because his principles soon start becoming confused and paradoxical:
4. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or MA as a whole.
In other words, in dealing with issues each group should be independent of all other groups except when it is not independent of other groups.
8. MA should remain forever nonprofessional, but our service centers may employ special workers.
Just not professionally special.
9. MA, as such, ought never be organized, but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.
This one's my favorite. Leave it to a born-again christianizing stoner organization to have as a fundamental principle the refusal to organize.
10. MA has no opinion on outside issues; hence the MA name ought never be drawn into public controversy.
Remember, thinking for yourself is what made you start smoking in the first place!
Anyways, while I got a kick out of it, I don't think I'll be joining. Besides, they gave me a helpful little excerpt of the format of their meetings:
"We who are marijuana addicts know the answer to this question: Marijuana controls our lives! We lose interest in all else; our dreams go up in smoke... Our lives, our thinking, and our desires center around Marijuana - scoring it, dealing it, and finding ways to stay high."
That last sentence is my new mantra.