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creamygoodness

United Kingdom

Member Since 2002

Followers 263 Following 284

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Tuesday Aug 02, 2005

Aug 2, 2005
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THINGS THAT, WHILE MAY BE USEFUL IN OTHER SITUATIONS, ARE INADVISABLE COURSES OF ACTION WHEN FINDING ONESELF IN A FIGHT WITH ONE OR MORE LARGE MEN:

Running his head under a warm tap for a few minutes to make it easier to screw his head off.

Asking him if he's on Myspace.

Send him a scolding e-mail and BCC in his boss

Down, Down-Forwards, Forwards + Punch

Cast aspersions on his sexuality

Leave him to soak in Coca-Cola overnight to remove that troublesome stain

Place several mothballs in his pocket to keep away cats and dogs.

Hastily improvise women's clothing and makeup, entice him with your feminine wiles, then smack him in the face witha frying pan as he puckers up for a kiss.

Challenging him to a disco-style dance-off.





Well, I'm certainly in a better mood, mostly having a nifty weekend spent in the company of good friends and unwise amounts of alcohol. Many thanks to one and all on saturday for a lovely time. And God knows I'm looking forwards to this weekend, another fun time out with the gang AND I get to see Social Distortion *wets pants

EDITZORZ: I'm going to subtly point you here as I think it's one of the better things I've written recently.
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
munch:
Lost = next wednesday!
Aug 3, 2005
johnnyforeigner:
Come on, there isn't a confrontation in the world that can't be solved by a disco dance-off. Remember VE day, 1945? Churchill managed the Electric Slide straight into The Worm and the Germans gave in?
Aug 3, 2005

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