Ok, first of all, obligatory SGUK meetup housekeeping:
Saturday was... well... eventful. It started off innocently enough (well, about as innocently as it gets round these here parts) in SGUK Chapter Headquarters, The Ship, as a number of us met up for drinks and other such merry japery, as the London Hardcore's resident exchange students,
Ladyinsane and Sianyriot were down in London for a Peaches gig the following day. However, as should be no surprise to anyone, things soon turned ugly (doubly so in the case of Kinto's two seperate stripteases). There was also an abundance of drunkenness, gang signs, snogging, goings-on in the girl's toilets and booblie-grabbing. Ok, roll call time:
Bloodflowers
Brainfreeze
Cakemix
G1
Kate
Kinto
Ladyinsane
Mariana
missellie
Munch
Partiallyblind
Pearlbass (very briefly)
Sianyriot
Tubesound
Vix
And then, big surprise, I was out again on the sunday night with the bunch of total madbastards that are the SGUK London Hardcore. After calling up Kinto and hearing tales of his sleeping rough in HSBC the previous night (it came as no surprise as he was completely and utterly langered) I went on to the Nellie Dean in Soho to meet Cakemix, Tubesound, Ladyinsane, Sianyriot, Wrathchild, Munch, Mariana, Vix and Nickysonic before they went on to the Peaches gig. On the way we stopped off at the newest tourist attraction in London, Nickysonic's bumming bed. Unfortunately Warthchild couldn't score a ticket from the scalpers and went home, leaving me and Vix to go onto the Dublin Castle up in Camden where we met Kate, G1, Pearlbass, Noscar, Chiroptera and Razorpsych to see Kate and Kerrie's band, Gin Panic. I enjoyed their set immensely, and I think I'm actually turning into a bit of a fan. Rest assured I'll be keeping an eye out for their next gig. After that I went back into town with Vix, bumped into Tubesound and Cakemix coming out of Harmony (a big sex shop, for the uninitiated), bid them farewell and a good night (snigger) and went for some chow at Ed's Diner.
Then, just to balance out the Karmic scales, there was today. No, no SGUK shennanigans, just the day-long training course that WOULD NOT DIE. In the interests of posterity I kept a mental log of the day so as to leave soemthing to future generations...
8:00am - Huh? Muh? Fucking alarm clock.
8:30am - Fngh... whazzat? Bah, sodding backup alarm cloc-FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK SHOWER SHAVE FUCK FUCK FUCK DRESSED GO FUCK FUCK FUCK
9:28am - Ack... gasp... heart attack... tell my mother... I loved her...
9:30am - Oh FUCK YOU VERY MUCH. You mean I ran up 6 flights of stairs only to be told the course is back down where I came from?
9:45am - ... who the Hell decided not to put a bell to call for someone to open the security door on this floor? I've been waiting 10 minutes.
9:50am - Ok, at last, here we go. So all I know is this course is called Net Navigator, well so long as it isn't a day spent learning how to use Google, I'm sure I'll learn something.
9:52am - ... I had to go and fucking say it, didn't I?
10:21am - Jesus, the woman holding this course really does sound like a pre-op transexual halfway through the hormones, her voice is all wobbly. Plus she's irritatingly chipper and laughs way too hard at her own jokes. How can people smile that widely at this time in the morning without the aid of narcotics?
10:23am - Wow, those are some big hands.
10:25am - Looks like she got a fair few whacks with the ugly stick too.
10:40am - Woah, so you mean... like.... when someone comes up to me with an enquiry... I should ask them what it is before I start looking for information? HOLY SHIT! YOU JUST BLEW MY MIND!
10:45am - NOPE, MIND STILL BLOWN HERE.
10:50am - OH MY GOD MY BLOWN MIND IS LEAKING OUT OF MY EARS.
11:05am - Oh Jesus, please don't pair me with my annoying, insulting, anally-retentive boss... oh you cow.
11:07am - "Oh come on now Ben, surely you can do better than that"
11:07am and 30 seconds - STAB YOUR BLACK HEART OUT YOU WHOREMONGER!
12:03pm - It must say something that I'd rather spend my lunch hour sitting in KFC, eating deep-fried salmonella, surrounded by chavvy pram-faced single mothers, than up there talking to people who don't seem to realise there is a world beyond the Library service.
1:15pm - I'm being paid for this. I'm being paid for this. I'm being paid for this. I'm being paid for this.
1:20pm - "So, does anyone know what the basic difference is between search engines and web directories?"
1:21pm - GGYYYARRRGGHHHH!!!!!!!
2:34pm - Ok, let's see, SG... filtered... b3ta... filtered... hotmail... filtered... metafilter... filtered... Chud... filtered... slashdot... unfiltered. Figures.
2:42pm - Wow, those Slashdotters really do like their Linux.
2:51pm - Jesus Christ, why don't they just cut to the chase and start humping
the damn Linux penguin already?
3:03pm - Stop. Watching. The. Clock. Goddamn. You.
3:15pm - The Internet just went down on all our computers. And the blasted chipper tranny man/woman is still going, she's trying to teach us the Internet WITH NO GODDAMNED INTERNET.
3:35pm - Christ almighty, just let us go already! You've just drawn a little picture of the Google front page just to point out to us where the advanced search link is, YOU ARE THE VERY DEFINITION OF FUTILITY!
3:59pm - FREE! FREE! FREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Saturday was... well... eventful. It started off innocently enough (well, about as innocently as it gets round these here parts) in SGUK Chapter Headquarters, The Ship, as a number of us met up for drinks and other such merry japery, as the London Hardcore's resident exchange students,
Ladyinsane and Sianyriot were down in London for a Peaches gig the following day. However, as should be no surprise to anyone, things soon turned ugly (doubly so in the case of Kinto's two seperate stripteases). There was also an abundance of drunkenness, gang signs, snogging, goings-on in the girl's toilets and booblie-grabbing. Ok, roll call time:
Bloodflowers
Brainfreeze
Cakemix
G1
Kate
Kinto
Ladyinsane
Mariana
missellie
Munch
Partiallyblind
Pearlbass (very briefly)
Sianyriot
Tubesound
Vix
And then, big surprise, I was out again on the sunday night with the bunch of total madbastards that are the SGUK London Hardcore. After calling up Kinto and hearing tales of his sleeping rough in HSBC the previous night (it came as no surprise as he was completely and utterly langered) I went on to the Nellie Dean in Soho to meet Cakemix, Tubesound, Ladyinsane, Sianyriot, Wrathchild, Munch, Mariana, Vix and Nickysonic before they went on to the Peaches gig. On the way we stopped off at the newest tourist attraction in London, Nickysonic's bumming bed. Unfortunately Warthchild couldn't score a ticket from the scalpers and went home, leaving me and Vix to go onto the Dublin Castle up in Camden where we met Kate, G1, Pearlbass, Noscar, Chiroptera and Razorpsych to see Kate and Kerrie's band, Gin Panic. I enjoyed their set immensely, and I think I'm actually turning into a bit of a fan. Rest assured I'll be keeping an eye out for their next gig. After that I went back into town with Vix, bumped into Tubesound and Cakemix coming out of Harmony (a big sex shop, for the uninitiated), bid them farewell and a good night (snigger) and went for some chow at Ed's Diner.
Then, just to balance out the Karmic scales, there was today. No, no SGUK shennanigans, just the day-long training course that WOULD NOT DIE. In the interests of posterity I kept a mental log of the day so as to leave soemthing to future generations...
8:00am - Huh? Muh? Fucking alarm clock.
8:30am - Fngh... whazzat? Bah, sodding backup alarm cloc-FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK SHOWER SHAVE FUCK FUCK FUCK DRESSED GO FUCK FUCK FUCK
9:28am - Ack... gasp... heart attack... tell my mother... I loved her...
9:30am - Oh FUCK YOU VERY MUCH. You mean I ran up 6 flights of stairs only to be told the course is back down where I came from?
9:45am - ... who the Hell decided not to put a bell to call for someone to open the security door on this floor? I've been waiting 10 minutes.
9:50am - Ok, at last, here we go. So all I know is this course is called Net Navigator, well so long as it isn't a day spent learning how to use Google, I'm sure I'll learn something.
9:52am - ... I had to go and fucking say it, didn't I?
10:21am - Jesus, the woman holding this course really does sound like a pre-op transexual halfway through the hormones, her voice is all wobbly. Plus she's irritatingly chipper and laughs way too hard at her own jokes. How can people smile that widely at this time in the morning without the aid of narcotics?
10:23am - Wow, those are some big hands.
10:25am - Looks like she got a fair few whacks with the ugly stick too.
10:40am - Woah, so you mean... like.... when someone comes up to me with an enquiry... I should ask them what it is before I start looking for information? HOLY SHIT! YOU JUST BLEW MY MIND!
10:45am - NOPE, MIND STILL BLOWN HERE.
10:50am - OH MY GOD MY BLOWN MIND IS LEAKING OUT OF MY EARS.
11:05am - Oh Jesus, please don't pair me with my annoying, insulting, anally-retentive boss... oh you cow.
11:07am - "Oh come on now Ben, surely you can do better than that"
11:07am and 30 seconds - STAB YOUR BLACK HEART OUT YOU WHOREMONGER!
12:03pm - It must say something that I'd rather spend my lunch hour sitting in KFC, eating deep-fried salmonella, surrounded by chavvy pram-faced single mothers, than up there talking to people who don't seem to realise there is a world beyond the Library service.
1:15pm - I'm being paid for this. I'm being paid for this. I'm being paid for this. I'm being paid for this.
1:20pm - "So, does anyone know what the basic difference is between search engines and web directories?"
1:21pm - GGYYYARRRGGHHHH!!!!!!!
2:34pm - Ok, let's see, SG... filtered... b3ta... filtered... hotmail... filtered... metafilter... filtered... Chud... filtered... slashdot... unfiltered. Figures.
2:42pm - Wow, those Slashdotters really do like their Linux.
2:51pm - Jesus Christ, why don't they just cut to the chase and start humping
the damn Linux penguin already?
3:03pm - Stop. Watching. The. Clock. Goddamn. You.
3:15pm - The Internet just went down on all our computers. And the blasted chipper tranny man/woman is still going, she's trying to teach us the Internet WITH NO GODDAMNED INTERNET.
3:35pm - Christ almighty, just let us go already! You've just drawn a little picture of the Google front page just to point out to us where the advanced search link is, YOU ARE THE VERY DEFINITION OF FUTILITY!
3:59pm - FREE! FREE! FREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
VIEW 27 of 27 COMMENTS
marianabanana:
...among other things.
marianabanana:
Prevert.