crazedone

I'll give a nickel's worth of free advice. Never let yourself fall into debt (especially if you have a drinking problem). It is the modern day version of indentured servitude. I will now write in tangents.

I was a smart kid for the most part but when times got tough a few times in the past, I allowed myself to slip and I got myself into relatively high debt.

Except for few occasions, I only drink on the weekends. The amount I spend at the bar just demolishes most of my left over income and has slowed my repayment of debt. Why do I do this? There are many reasons, however, none of them are logical though. I just end up making poor choices.

I am almost 33 and I am still making bad choices.

I seem to hit this spot every couple years where I pull back the reigns and delve deeper into self improvement. I get selfish. I went through college, I got my crappy bachelors degree in business/computers, I have a good job, I have my little boy who makes me laugh. I don't know what my problem is. I think that I just lived and strived for the ideals of other people and ended up in a place that I never exactly wanted.

I get scared the older I get. I feel more and more confused and realize that I don't know shit no matter how much I learn.