AV NO GOT ANEH CHILDREHN
I work for a charity. On the face of it that may make me seem like a wonderful, caring person, but in reality, no. It's not a volunteer job. Infact I get paid an obscene amount to do what is essentially a piss easy job. I sit on my ass for three hours a night, four nights a week, trying to force people to sign up for some lottery deal that costs them a pound a week. Said pound a week probably goes more towards my salary than it does to any kids with brain damage.
As such I get to hear the voices of some of the most bizarre people in Britain. So, without any better ideas and considering I havent updated this thing for a while, I thought Id share some of the responses Ive gotten over the phone.
1. Hello. Im phoning from a charity-
No.
.....
Nooo no no.
Um-
Bye! *click*
2. Hello, Im phoning from a charity for brain injured children-
*thick scottish accent*BRINGEN UP CHILDREHN?!
No, brain injuried children.
BRINGEN UP CHILDREHN?! AV NO GOT ANY CHILDREHN!
.....
AV NO GOT ANY CHILDREHN!
.....
HALLO?!
*click*
3. Hello, Im phoning from a charity for brain injured children.
Yupyup.
We're just phoning to update you about our new fundraising lottery.
Yupyup
How it works is that you send us a pound a week-
Yupyup
*click* (at this point I had to hang up in order to burst out laughing)
4. Hello, Im phoning from a charity for brain injured children.
*pant pant*Yes
Uh, we're just phoning to update you about our fundraising lottery.
*pant, gasp* Okay
Um, how it works is that-
*heave* Is it alright if you phone back another time
Yeah I thought so too *click*
5, Hello, Im phone from a charity-
OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT NOW!
Um...
ALWAYS FUCKIN' PHONING ME AND ASKING ME TO BUY DOUBLE GLAZING OR INSURANCE OR SOME SHIT, WHY CANT YOU LEAVE ME ALONE, HOW DID YOU EVEN GET MY PHONE NUMBER. LEECHES, LEECHES YOU PEOPLE ARE, ALWAYS PESTERING PEOPLE AND WANTING SOMETHING FROM THEM. WHAT DO YOU WANT?! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME??
,,,,
WHO ARE YOU ANYWAY?
*click*
6. Hello, Im phoning from a charity-
HELLO? *click*
.....
*click*
.....
*click*
.....
*click* GET OFF THE FUCKING PHONE!
Ahaha *click*
Some people shouldnt be allowed to own phones.
Oh and if you're deaf, why the fuck do you have a phone in the first place?
I work for a charity. On the face of it that may make me seem like a wonderful, caring person, but in reality, no. It's not a volunteer job. Infact I get paid an obscene amount to do what is essentially a piss easy job. I sit on my ass for three hours a night, four nights a week, trying to force people to sign up for some lottery deal that costs them a pound a week. Said pound a week probably goes more towards my salary than it does to any kids with brain damage.
As such I get to hear the voices of some of the most bizarre people in Britain. So, without any better ideas and considering I havent updated this thing for a while, I thought Id share some of the responses Ive gotten over the phone.
1. Hello. Im phoning from a charity-
No.
.....
Nooo no no.
Um-
Bye! *click*
2. Hello, Im phoning from a charity for brain injured children-
*thick scottish accent*BRINGEN UP CHILDREHN?!
No, brain injuried children.
BRINGEN UP CHILDREHN?! AV NO GOT ANY CHILDREHN!
.....
AV NO GOT ANY CHILDREHN!
.....
HALLO?!
*click*
3. Hello, Im phoning from a charity for brain injured children.
Yupyup.
We're just phoning to update you about our new fundraising lottery.
Yupyup
How it works is that you send us a pound a week-
Yupyup
*click* (at this point I had to hang up in order to burst out laughing)
4. Hello, Im phoning from a charity for brain injured children.
*pant pant*Yes
Uh, we're just phoning to update you about our fundraising lottery.
*pant, gasp* Okay
Um, how it works is that-
*heave* Is it alright if you phone back another time
Yeah I thought so too *click*
5, Hello, Im phone from a charity-
OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT NOW!
Um...
ALWAYS FUCKIN' PHONING ME AND ASKING ME TO BUY DOUBLE GLAZING OR INSURANCE OR SOME SHIT, WHY CANT YOU LEAVE ME ALONE, HOW DID YOU EVEN GET MY PHONE NUMBER. LEECHES, LEECHES YOU PEOPLE ARE, ALWAYS PESTERING PEOPLE AND WANTING SOMETHING FROM THEM. WHAT DO YOU WANT?! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME??
,,,,
WHO ARE YOU ANYWAY?
*click*
6. Hello, Im phoning from a charity-
HELLO? *click*
.....
*click*
.....
*click*
.....
*click* GET OFF THE FUCKING PHONE!
Ahaha *click*
Some people shouldnt be allowed to own phones.
Oh and if you're deaf, why the fuck do you have a phone in the first place?
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~cheers