cosyne

*** 151 days remain ***

Cosyne deals with a confused customer

Yesterday a woman came into my work
She said, "I'll have a larger salad and a pizza."
There's only one problem
I work in a coffee shop
We sure as fuck don't sell pizza
Our "salads" are greens in a plastic box and come in ONE SIZE
I explained to her that she was confused
She got mad at me becuase SOMEONE told her we had a full dinner menu
I told her to go the mall
Then I promptly buried an ax in her brain
"I'll have a larger salad and a pizza."
What is the salad larger than?
I mean, if you're using a comparative, don't you need something to compare?
I guess when she said 'larger', she meant like larger than a ladybug -- or a rice krispy -- or a deuterium molecule
Deuterium is often called 'Heavy Water'
And speaking of heavy, this woman was
The last thing she needed was a pizza
She was fat
And old

How do these people exist?