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corpse81

Joliet

Member Since 2004

Followers 9 Following 26

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Wednesday Aug 08, 2007

Aug 8, 2007
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You know what sucks? My life. I was thinking about stuff, and reading my autobiography earlier. Here is an excerpt that I will discuss:

"It also seems that whenever my relationships were bad or nonexistent, I excelled at school and work only because I had nothing better to take up my time. So if I'm miserable in that area, I succeed in the other. It makes no sense and I'm tired of it."

I'd like to add another part to that....

"It also seems that whenever my mind is ok, my body goes to shit. I can't have sound mind AND sound body at the same time. It's one or the other."

My headaches and "sweet spot" on my neck seemed to do a little better when I was on prednisone, but I went psycho. Now that I stopped taking that shit, my mind is better (back to not caring mode) but my body is killing me. I fucked up my feet from wearing crappy shoes the other day, and I could barely walk at work last night. And my sweet spot was throbbing all fucking night, and my fucking headaches are worse than ever. Course...there are many other theories. I was in bed for 4 days while I was on it, because I was in a major psycho depression. My accupunture doctor wants to try vitamins and diet, and I'm all for that.


Also, I'm really into figuring out typical behavior of adults. Specifically men. For instance...when a guy just up and starts ignoring u, that means he got a girlfriend. When he starts treating you like crap even though he said he wanted to be ur friend....not sure. Or ....after you make a move, they start ignoring you or not wanting to hang out. That's what happened with me and John, one of my old friends. I asked him to hang out numerous times after I kissed him, and he always says he's busy. I don't think these guys really get that I can have sex and not act like a "girl". But maybe they think im just saying that cuz Ii want to "change" them....or trap them into something, you know how these idiots are. I think guys think girls can't be as cold about sex as they can. NOT TRUE. All I ask in return is that I don't hear about other women they are interested in/fucking/messing around with. Otherwise I have a normal "girly" reaction, so maybe that's what they are scared of. Don't get me wrong; I don't think I would enjoy only talking to the guy once a month to get together to screw. I'm talking about "Friends with benefits". I enjoy that. But I don't mean just straight fucking. I like to snuggle, kiss, caress, massage...all the lovey dovey things, but that doesn't mean I'm in love with the dude or want to marry him. I just enjoy close personal relations with certain people. And snuggling too. heehee.If it made clear to me that the guy does not want a "serious" relationship, then I know my place and will not allow myself to think otherwise. This is the beauty of lexapro and NOT being on prednisone. I become cold. I much preffer being cold than over emotional.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
abracadabra:
"the sky..the sky..the sky's gone out"
Aug 9, 2007
deny:
I hope you are well. I've taken Prednisone numerous times since I was a kid. I've never been on it longer than a two-week period of time before. But, I do know of its side effects and I know several people that DO take it on a regular basis.
Aug 12, 2007

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