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corporatespy

Chicago.

Member Since 2005

Followers 18 Following 75

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Tuesday Aug 16, 2005

Aug 16, 2005
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So... I don't really have anything profound to say today other than relating the "smurf jizz" story from yesterday.

Trans and I were walking through Arizona mills on Monday, trying to buy him a phone for 3 hours. (No he bought the phone in like 5 mins but the activation was being weird so it took like 3 hours) So we got bored and walked around. At one point, some woman trying to pimp some lotion from a kiosk in the center of the isle accosted us, begging us to let her put shit that smelled like pesticide and flowers on us. I said, "no thanks", and trans walked on by, seemingly ignoring her. Then, after stepping maybe 2 steps past the woman, trans spins around abruptly, jutting his hand out palm side up, and exclaiming in a loud excited voice that somewhat reminded me of the bad guy in Who framed roger rabbit... "OOooOoOoooo!! LOTION!!!" The woman spun around with the weirdest "what the fuck?!" look in her eyes, and startled, squeezed a huge glob of this blue lotion into his palm. Trans looks at me, as I was doubled over laughing and goes "Dude! Sweet! Lotion!" and turns around walking around palm still up in the air, and a big thing of blue goop in his hand. Which, I must say looked like smurf jizz. Like he had just gotten done giving a handjob to a smurf and didnt know quite what to do with the shit in his hand. After offering the lotion in his hand to someone else we knew who was working there, we proceeded to walk out of the mall, goo still in hand. That may have been a "you had to be there" story. But I did take a picture from my phone, which Ill post up here in a few. I've always wanted to fuck with the kiosk people like that... I salute you! LOL.

Hell, I lied... I'll end this on a thought from some lyrics.

"When I was lost, I saw the forest was dark;
You lose the fire and the flame with the loss of the spark.
I let my body house demons,
That fed on my mind.
I was looking for myself,
To myself I was blind.
Because my senses confused, with what was once so real;
I could not hear, taste, touch, or fear.
But slowly I try at each and every cost to rebuild these strengths that I've lost.

It's not my fault that you lost your way;
Your insanity will prevail.
It's not my fault that you lost your way;
Your insanity will prevail...

So test drive to the forest, to the jungle,
To the place outside yourself.
I'm speaking strictly of the self,
You know as I jump, slip step deep and wide.
And watch all the animals,
The mammals, lions, fishes, and the camels.
And you know what they're gonna do:
They'll set you up,
They'll knock you down,
They'll kick your ass all over your hometown.
And they're gonna ask you something that you've got to learn to do,
It's something that's so good for you:
You know you roar...
You roar...
You roar!

Jump.

Your insanity will prevail. "-bran van 3000:Forest
riotownzyou:
Fucking. Awesome. And not because i drank my weight in vanilla stoli, but because it kicked so much ass. You should slit your wrists for missing out. Hope to see you at 3 Bad Jacks next week miao!!

Riot.
Aug 20, 2005
riotownzyou:
Saturday, Rogue West. If you go to the Friday show at Modified, be prepared for the underaged midgets who cant get into bars...and no alcohol will be served. See you Saturday ;-)
Aug 20, 2005

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