cornelius

i knew my valentine's holiday just wouldn't be complete until some girl who i barely know brought up the question of my sexual prowess... and that's exactly what happened.

what was basically said was that since i am not the physical picture of her scrawny masculine ideal, then there is no way that i could ever satisfy a woman.

she doesn't even know me, but it still bothers me, three days later. what she doesn't know is that as a bigger than average individual, i have to work a lot harder than my contemporaries... having a different body image, i appreciate things that never even occur to lesser men.

i set the table. i open doors. i remember birthdays and court dates. i cook, i clean. i'm thoughtful, i'm considerate. i own two sets of metal handcuffs, the kind that leave bruises... my tongue knows no borders. yeah, i'm the type of guy that has to put in work, wooing and retaining a woman's love, the kind of work that almost always pays off.

secretly, i wanted to call her a stupid ho, but that isn't my style... instead i told her "no offense, but there's no way i'd ever even want to prove you wrong anyhow."

i'm pretty sure she didn't believe me.

-bobby