sometimes i wonder what shitty thing could possibly happen next.
though atleast i can be thankful that i havent been diagnosed with a terminal disease (yet), and that im not pregnant and on welfare or something. i wish i could figure out what to do with my life, with myself..i just cant decide what would be best. i always want two completely opposite things, in all aspects of my life really. it sucks. i realize that i havent been the best person and that i deserve some of the shittyness, but it doesnt make it suck any less. deserved misery is still misery.
P.S. TO MY EX ACQUAINTANCES:please stop meddling and mind your own business. i realize that youre just trying to help your friend, but seriously, everytime you get involved it just makes things way worse for both of us-including him. so id appreciate it if you would just let us work our own shit out. i know you all think im soo terrible etc, but keep in mind that youre only hearing one side of things and that hes probably not going to bother spewing to people about the good & loving times between us.
*edited to sugarcoat the above paragraph. i know how everyones panties get in a knot when i say exactly what i think and apparently im not one of those people who's harshness is charming.
though atleast i can be thankful that i havent been diagnosed with a terminal disease (yet), and that im not pregnant and on welfare or something. i wish i could figure out what to do with my life, with myself..i just cant decide what would be best. i always want two completely opposite things, in all aspects of my life really. it sucks. i realize that i havent been the best person and that i deserve some of the shittyness, but it doesnt make it suck any less. deserved misery is still misery.
P.S. TO MY EX ACQUAINTANCES:please stop meddling and mind your own business. i realize that youre just trying to help your friend, but seriously, everytime you get involved it just makes things way worse for both of us-including him. so id appreciate it if you would just let us work our own shit out. i know you all think im soo terrible etc, but keep in mind that youre only hearing one side of things and that hes probably not going to bother spewing to people about the good & loving times between us.
*edited to sugarcoat the above paragraph. i know how everyones panties get in a knot when i say exactly what i think and apparently im not one of those people who's harshness is charming.