cookie101x

'ello all, today is a blah day..ive done nothing but loaf around watching tv..sigh. tonights prospects arent looking good either.. blah, so thanks to everyone for all the nice compliments and comments.They definately make me feel more like trying again..and again..and again.. to get a set accepted.
Hey look its the kool aid man


so all the funeral business is done, im glad its overwith , but i didnt get to really reconnect with some people that wanted to..oh well i guess.. the whole thing made me think of who all would be at my funeral if i randomly died..i dont think i would have even 1/4 of the people she did.. so im thinking about possibly trying harder to get back in touch with some people..to be a little more social..and nice..I have sort of a problem with being a cynical bitch..hasnt worked out for me as well as i hoped.ha. But all of that is easier said than done..im very used to being the unemotional, logical, bluntly honest type..i like it, im hapy being that way..by myself i guess, but it hasnt earned me any awards for popularity.Thats not saying im not fun or nice when i want to be, like when people really deserve it..or when im drunk, now if onlyi could be drunk all the time, my lack of friends problem would be solved,heh. That and most people i have ever known have screwed me over at one time or another or are like, best friends with the people/person that screwed me over, and i view connections like that to be dangerous..like asking for some shit to be stirred up. ugh. my brain turbulence is irritating. anyways, thanks again to everyone for the niceties, ill update again soon, hopefully with less of a pity party rant..but hey, atleast i showed you a kool aid man