I got up to take a piss (and i want to thank whomever it was that disarmed the bear traps scattered across my bedroom floor.)
When i got to the toilet to piss, my penis had not yet woken up. startled, he bit his lip with the tiny penis teeth located in the hole of my penis (his mouth.) I soon realized this was only a minor inconvenience. Because seconds later, goblin-like arms sprouted from my knees. They tied a bib around my nutsack, and with a fork and knife, proceeded to slice my penis into small pieces, and feed them to my hungry feet.
Needless to say, I was shocked by this turn of events. So shocked tht my nipples fell off. I then fell backward and bumped my head on the bathtub, knocking myself unconsious.
I woke up, late for work. Luckily i got my landlord to write a note for me, to explain my prediciment to my boss.
After reading the note, my boss was understanding. She pledged allegience to the flag and gave me a hickey.
When i got to the toilet to piss, my penis had not yet woken up. startled, he bit his lip with the tiny penis teeth located in the hole of my penis (his mouth.) I soon realized this was only a minor inconvenience. Because seconds later, goblin-like arms sprouted from my knees. They tied a bib around my nutsack, and with a fork and knife, proceeded to slice my penis into small pieces, and feed them to my hungry feet.
Needless to say, I was shocked by this turn of events. So shocked tht my nipples fell off. I then fell backward and bumped my head on the bathtub, knocking myself unconsious.
I woke up, late for work. Luckily i got my landlord to write a note for me, to explain my prediciment to my boss.
After reading the note, my boss was understanding. She pledged allegience to the flag and gave me a hickey.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
parks:
your evilfast song came on my ipod while I was at work, I think I actually like it more than the orginal version of the song.
otoki:
Yes. Without the whole dying part.