contradiction

hey everyone. wassup?

I am going out to a show this evening. Should be kick ass - friends of mine opening up for the Cruxshadows. Hopefully get to chill at an afterparty. Woowoo! I wish more people were going with me. *shrug* oh well. Fun fun! If it makes any difference, I am wearing a corset...heh...and fishnets...and platform boots...

Anyways...I feel kinda disoriented by my life right now. A lot is going on, and some things are at a dead standstill. Still haven't been able to get my recording system. This coming weekend is supposed to be a show with my friend's band that my guy is playing in, weekend after, another one. I still owe people a lot of money. They cancelled my court date for tomorrow (which is good if I stay out late tonight...heh...). I owe 2 car payments. No money to fix that. My guy thinks that all sorts of other things should come before it. So I may lose it...after only owing 2 more years on it. Bleck. I was doing so well. I have to go see someone at a different bank AGAIN to get the charges on my account erased ($510 of them!!!!). My guy is extremely stressed by work and alternates between forgetting that exist, taking his stress out on me, and accusing me of being pissed off for no good reason (half the time I am not even pissed...confused, yes...pissed, no). I am about to implode.

ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!