contradiction

I'm such a fuck up.

I just about destroyed my relationship with the one person I have ever truly loved because for a moment I let a group of really painful memories trick me into thinking I did not trust him.

The fucked thing is, I do trust him. Very much so. The past is the past. We had a rough go the first time around.

As he said - "not all memories are painless, but the past is not the present or the future, for either of us."

I am glad that sometimes he is a wiser person than I. He gave me a page full of quotes from the movie that started us on the road to getting back together - "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" and wrote the above quote on the top.

He truly loves me. I know that. I need to stop being an idiot.

"I could die right now, Clem. I'm just...happy. I've never felt that before. I'm just exactly where I want to be."
-- Joel, "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind"