contextual

So today i learned my boss is homophobic; at least he purveys homophobia (is it real or what he feels people want to see?) So we're being schmoozed by a company that we buy from and he has a few drinnks and tells us about a conference call with 2 financial men that he was sure was gay, I'll save the details, but I didn't mention that I'll suck a cock if it appeals to me. Not any cock, just the sexy ones. OK, so there's this guy who works in my group and he's invited everyone to his wedding but me. I guess I've got to ask him why, I'm afraid to find out the answer. Am I a jerk?

I started writing these for Psychemoon, but she stopped commenting about the time I admitted to drinking and driving. Coincidence? Maybe, but I've got to say something because I've noticed. I'm so self conciouse. Can I do somethign just for me?! No, everything I do is for the benefit of others. What do I do just for me?

God I want to be loved again.