conan

So its Friday of last week right and my fuckn call
time is seven in the morning I cant find parking by
the Kipling motel cause its street cleaning Friday,
LA has the most ridiculous racket with parking, but
that happens later in the story. So I walk up the
first flight of stairs to find Richard the production
designer, my boss, my self being the set carpenter for
the independent feature digital video STATIONS as
in stations of the cross, not important, what is
important is that Richard explains the entire days
plan of events for the painters and set
constructionist, me, well actually elevator
constructionist, Ive built for stagings in four
different places of elevators for this show, anyway,
10 minutes later I have no idea what the fuck Richard
is talking about other than will dailyrest (Bryon) the
director has a truck to the directors house in eagle
rock during rush hour morning traffic to get the other
elevator I had framed and built with the fat carpenter
Paul from Michigan a week prior, and that the painters
name is J, I thought he was gay so referred to him as
the gay painter but on the way to eagle rock in the
directors truck we talked d about the hot waitresses
at the yeol rustic inn of los feliz where we both
reside. The rustic is one block up and east from the
Dresden. Anyway his name is J and hes not gay and I
have the keys to Bryons truck.

Bryon the director who some times goes by the
pseudonym of will dailyrest has no idea where is truck
is parked, it might be on Harvard and it might be by a
school, so J and I imbark,, embark on the find Bryons
truck game to drive it to eagle rock and pick up
elevator 1 out of 4. We find the truck a beige 1984
Toyota compact pick up, I unlock the door and try to
hop in the drivers seat immediately falling back out
the door cause the seat is pulled all the way up, J
laughs, but ceases once both him and I fail to push
the seats back. We are both over six feet tall, the
seats are all the way forward its eight oclock in
the morning and the truck smells like cat piss, plus
its a fuckn stick, so Im burnn on this fuck clutch
cause I cant lift my leg up cause the seats all the
way forward then theirs the gas gauge, fuck man it
was hanging, dangling below E, and there was no
fucking way I was putting gas in this fucker, so off
to eagle rock we drive making fun off bryons sick
imhability to directed Richards creepy eyed close
talking and dirty teeth, and the fact that their was a
security club sitting on the floor of this peace of
shit truck no gas, broken seqats no radio, and a
nubbling clutch.

Exit Hollywood enter eagle rock, load elevator enter
Hollywood.

So we pull to the front of the Kipling hotel and start
untying the ropes from the staging, Richard come down
and inspects the truck, takes a gander at the trailer
hitch and says hay conan this is a nice trailer
hitch where did you get this truck. I say dude, its
Bryons truck, Richard says this isnt Bryans truck
Bryans truck is yellow this is beig, YOU STOLE A
TRUCK!!!!!!!!!


So last Friday I stole a truck and it was awesome the
keys for the directors truck unlocked and started this
random guys truck that lives between 3rd and 2nd
street on kingsly blvd.

All the screws from the disassembled elevator where
left on the passenger side seat of the stolen truck.
Because we stole a truck instead of taking the
directors his was towed for blocking street cleaning.

Holyshit dude, true story