complicity

Dear Santa,
Please can i have my memory back for xmas? I appreciate that this may be difficult as it was last seen in the company of several suspicious looking memories, and may easily have been led astray, but it is deep down a good memory with good teeth and bright eyes.
Thank you.


Well at least i changed my profile pic.

I'm so over this aspirational consumer bollocks. I realise i may be paraphrasing 'Fight Club' here but really, what is the point in slaving your ass off, drooling and yearning for some shiny piece of crap that is fundamentally the same as the piece of crap you're replacing (slow dawning realisation that my last post regarded my new phone so i'm a hypocrite, sue me, i'm human and thus fickle, emotional and irrational, i've also run out of weed, so i'm liable to rant) does very little to actually enhance your life, probably used several thousand tons of whatever fossil fuel you prefer to get made, arrived in 15 giant redwoods worth of pointless packaging and has probably been shipped halfway round the world from some lice infested flea pit of a sweat shop, in a horrendously polluting vehicle or 17 before arriving to drain the life out you, your relationships and the planet, before ultimatly being rendered obselete after about 15 nano seconds.


Whilst i'm getting things off my chest (i'm waxing as we speak!
)
Xmas is not on my agenda this year either, it seems pointless, my friends are all off doing family things, which, of course they will, it's what people do, but i'd really like to spend it with some of them, they've all been so cool recently and i'd love to cook em all xmas dinner or something to say thanks, but you can't tear em away from their homes i guess!
My family on the other hand is being as vague as usual, my mother asked me the other night why no one in this family will say what they really want, so i said 'well what i'd really like is to have dinner at my dads place (home) with everyone there and no weirdness'. But i don't know if that'll be worse, it's probably at least unrealistic, there's no way it can be like it used to be. I just really don't want to be driving all over the country on xmas day again feeling the pressure of time, worrying that i haven't spent enough time with one or other of them, feeling guilty.................aaaaaahhhhhhh badgers bollocks and bats twats
ps Santa can i please have a Berretta 9mm, a samurai sword, a leather jacket (i'm cold) and a kiss from a pretty girl.
Those aren't things i aspire to in order to consume by the way... they're righteous artifacts of retribution!