comiddle

When shopping for bananas or grapes I absolutely must pick them up with the same guarded disgust one picks up a freshly deposited rottweiler dropping. I grab a produce bag, turn it inside out and go wild.

... I just have an irrational fear of spiders, that's all.

I take the fruit home and leave it in the bag. I tear bananas apart in the bag. Grapes are rinsed for 5 minutes under cold water so as to wash away any freaky arachnids; of course I'm still left with webs and gunk on the stems, which has in fact scared me off grapes almost entirely. I don't even buy grapes anymore. I haven't bought a bunch of grapes in months! I always get my girlfriend to buy them for me.

Man I love bananas. Great in my Post Cranberry Crunch I eat every morning. Tasty with toast. Slice it open, throw some chocolate chips & marchmallows in there, wrap it in tin foil and bake it. Dig into the mushy mess with a spoon. It's like heaven! Why, why must I continue to find little creepy eight legged monstrosities crawling around in the bunches of bananas? Am I cursed with bad luck? What have I done to deserve this? I rarely kill the things. I throw open the door and shake them out onto the patio. Why, Omm, why?