comicking

I'll try to clarify my muddy mind. I need to make something to protect my hand from the other guys weapon while I'm fighting. I want to make a segmented gauntlet, basically a thick, rigid leather glove consructed like the tail armor on a lobster. However, on alternative I'm considering is just making a glove of hard leather with a hole in it for my hand, and the sword.

I always know when people are thinking about me. Sadly, people are hardly ever thinking about me. Sure they will say they were but I know they weren't. Bastards.

It did go very well. Everything is going very well. So well it makes me nervous. I keep expecting something to change..

Yeah i did quit for a long time. I was under some stress. Anyway I have managed to cut way back again and think I should be able to quit soon.

Long time no update. (heh look who is talking) nothing new going on?

Everyone always assumes that since I was wild and wicked in my youth previous to marrying Angie that it was she and her influnce upon me and my life that changed me and stopped my drug use.

Actually the case was that I had decided that I had had enough of the lifestyle when my heatlh started being affected by my drinking and drugging and when I saw people around me dropping like flies to the same things I was doing. I got sick of it all and just walked away from it and them.

If I had still been on drugs and booze when she and I met then she most likely would have hated me and we never would have been.

I guess when you think about it that way it sort of makes a good arguement for fate or destiny...or maybe just pure, blind, dumb luck.

-Josh

Yeah it was long. (so is this. Sorry)

Well, yeah, she is to some extent playing games with me. I think I know the purpose though and I can live with that.
I think I have laid it on the line with her and that is part of the problem. Not the fact that I have, but that we still want different things, but I also have hope that we can reach some kind of compromise.

I think a common misconception that people have had regarding my questions is that people haven't realized that, at least in regard to Jen and also regarding Law school girl, I am the one asking people to settle. I am the one who can only give so much. Although the effect may be that my need for Jen to settle will result in me settling for less as well.

A problem of course with asking people to settle and with telling people you can only give so much, is that sometimes they don't believe you. Jen has told me many times that there was no one I was more dishonest with than myself. She may be right. The fact remains, however, that I cant be more than friends. With her or with anyone else. Jen never accpeted that, although, I never really knew until our friendship began to erode. I believe that is why she is being cautious now. I think she wants to avoid developing the same depth of feeling that we once had.

The situation with law school girl is similar. It is clear to me that she thinks I may not be as firm in my resolve to not be more than friends as I think I am. She is wrong, at least as far as it pertains to her. This is something she makes clear more through actions than words. It may lead to me not being able to be friends with her at all. I would like to avoid that because, frankly I enjoy her company and she is willing to make more time for me than most people are lately.

I can be shy. Especially in certain situations. I am not always comfortable in public places or around large groups of people. I think the person who is different online is actually me. The person online is closer to the real me than the person you have met in person. Part of that has to do with location. I am not totally comfortable there. Because of that I tend to be more reserved. In fact I wear a mask there as I do most places. The mask I wear there, however, is one of the most concealing. I do think we have some things in common and that there is a basis for friendship, but like other people we know, I can be hard to get to know. This is likely to be compounded by where we see each other. It is just not a place where I tend to be comfortable around other people. That doesnt mean it cant/wont happen. I think it has already started to, but, it may take time.

Sorry to hear you are broke. I am in a very similar situation. I am not doing much outside work and it is starting to have a serious effect on my standard of living.



[Edited on Jul 03, 2004 7:15AM]

Did you ever stop to think that perhaps the reason for my not having erased my previous journal and simply putting a smily in its place is because of my being dumb as a dirt clod?

Thanks for the anniversary wishes.

Peace.

-Josh

The plans for my hair just like the plans for the show and the plans for everything else this weekend went straight to Hell.

-Josh

I know the feelin'. Things are tight right now... Doesn't help that I've never been "financially responsible." I'd consider a second job if I actually had the time for one... Though I suppose I do... But if I had any less free time, well...

Of course going postal would probably leave me with a ton of free time. But I'd be spending it in "the yard" spotting my new boyfriend as he lifted weights.

My eyes blew out about 6 or 7 years ago. At the end of the day you have to look at getting glasses like you would a battle scar. Be proud. You put your eyes through Hell but you're not givin' up yet!

bettie page?

ok yea, i just wasnt sure it was her and i didnt wanna guess her if it wasnt

yeah she is living in St. louis now, I am not too worried about the restraining order. Not her style plus it has gotten harder to get them in the last 5-10 years. I know, we try for em all the time on some of the pro bono stuff and I am amazed at how many aren't granted that I think should be. Anyway with the phone call thing, I think it is gonna be ok though, we have been playing phone tag since I first called, and each message from her has sounded friendlier than the last. Her last one just said "tag" and I could hear the smile in her voice.

It gladdens my heart that you have joy.

Great. Looks perfect.

welcome to the site!

your in the group-

Xaq

wow...um, so you wanna make out or sumpin??

heh no I dont think so, if she gets it herself I will deal with it, but the site has become my sanctuary, she has her own web communities she belongs to.

line though the name is definite zot. a black name can be either staff forcing someone anonymous or them doing it on their own.

If anything, I'm a gentlemen to a fault. No worries.

:tuffy:

[Edited on Jun 19, 2004 2:42AM]

Well i figured.
That would be impressive though for you to be here if you were that old!

Marvel rules DC drools

I do move around from time to time. Its mostly standing but i do walk around to get stuff sometimes.

Yea, i feel bad for Benni though. she got all lasered. As her minion manager i kind of wish i could have got lasered for her

Well at 90 you may be a bit too old for my sister. Plus shes already got a boyfriend

Howdy. i forgot to tell you, you made the cut. you are the first junior minion. I think you can even count on being minion of the month!

Since thejuanupsman beat me for the site, I figure I'll state it here, that Benni's new tatoo really rocks!