colinism

Well ok so today started the same as yesterday minus the part where I spit up blood, I had a feeling of impending doom and rolled out of bed took a shower watched about 10 minutes of charmed then got dressed for work. On the way to work I get pulled over for speeding, now mind you I have never gotten a speeding ticket EVER and this one he clocked me doing 85 in a 55, which I know I was not doing and no I did not ask to see the radar gun because not ever having gotten a ticket I did not think to ask.

Despite all my best efforts to be happy this week I keep seeming to end right back at the same spot, depressed and feeling alone. I know I am not, I know I should feel otherwise but damn if I can't stop. Things started to feel wierd for me last friday/saturday I thought I was just tired but the whole time I had something in my mind bothering me, several times I thought I figured it out and I did feel better but then something else would happen to balance it out and I felt like crap again. Emotiions suck in general, mine suck big time because I never just feel something a little, I am always all or nothing and having stong emotions is fucking BS there should be a setting for these things.

Anyhow enough of this EMO bs I will be back on at some point to see what people are up to and hopefully I will feel better by then.