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code_red

Member Since 2005

Followers 25 Following 49

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Friday Nov 10, 2006

Nov 10, 2006
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Note to self:

I never have been able to understand you. Your words and actions aren't always equal, your theories and methods don't always match. You always try to show to be the valent hero, but you always hide your darkest side for fear of rejection. You hate yourself because you don't understand yourself, and that is causing problems for the both of us. How are we to survive with this war? Stop your drinking and end your thinking; your attitude is setting up for failure. You know what the worst part of all this is? You know it. I know it. And I know you want everyone else to know it, but it won't happen. You want someone to lean on, you want someone to take care of you while you rest, but it cannot happen. Not now, and not like this. So man the fuck up and continue on, we got shit to do. When you are clear-headed, think about moving forward. If you slow down, you might trip over your own feet... You might just fall apart at the seams that you have so cautiously sewn together. You might just end it. But seriously, that's no fun for either of us. Do me a favor. Do yourself a favor. Just move on and shine on. You have the power, you egotistical bastard. Take some credit for your actions and use your credit to get some action. You have earned it, I have earned it and for God sakes let's earn it. Shine on you crazy diamond, and let's never have this conversation again.

Note to self: I miss you terribly.

-Red.
widow:
oh RED!

Goodness, this is the first time that I've ventured over to your page...goodness me. Quite a bit of vulnerability that you just splattered on the page just there.

do you have some time to be very quiet with yourself? for say, a month? i noticed that when i really took the time to just retreat, far far away, it all began to make sense. i think the mind gets saturated with psychedellic (hmm@ that spelling..not much of a speller per say) kaleidescope (again...sp..) of distortion. things make sense for individual people, but not much sense for the mind staring out onto a landscape of billions of people.

breathe. lots. breathe. it's amazing what it'll do for you.

you sound like you have a lot of potential, and much to be proud of. I'm looking forward to seeing what you end up doing.

buttercups.
Nov 13, 2006

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