-Willy Wonka, who is seemingly in charge of making Runts candy, really needs to just face reality and realize banana is the best flavor they got. He needs to release a whole package of just bananas. I know I'd sure as shit buy more Runts if that were the case. Man, if only I could be in charge of stuff.
- I have a feeling that with the way the teenage pregnancy rate is nowadays, GILFs are going to be a big thing in 15-20 years.
- And, on the subject of MILFs, as I get older, I start to question the MILF prerequisites. I mean, can a 16 year old with a child be considered a MILF? I think the broad has to be at least 15 years older than you to get MILF status, otherwise, its just a new creepy off-shoot of kiddie porn.
- Still on MILFs......I think in the future, MILF will become a way for teenagers to let their parents know they are ready for sex.
-Johnny: Mom, I'd like to fuck my girlfriend.
-Mom: Johnny! Have some manners! It's MILF my girlfriend.
- Its amazing to me how fast a friend can turn and break guy code when a hot chick wanting to touch his penis is involved.
- While in Hollywood, I expected to see hookers standing on every street corner. When I made a comment that I had not seen any yet, my friend pointed out that I must be retarded because they were "everywhere". Which leads me to one of two conclusions: A). Hookers dress like regular women, or B). All women dress like hookers. I'll let you decide.
- Does anyone outside the MLB believe in wearing a baseball cap the right way anymore?
- After the VTech shootings, a CNN news reporter revealed to the world that the grieving students at Virginia Tech had respectfully asked all of the media to go home so that the student body could heal in peace. This news was reported live from Blacksburg, at the campus of Virginia Tech. Sometimes, I hate people. I really do.
- A recent study shows that most college sororities discriminate against fat chicks. Also, in case you were wondering, rain has a tendency to get you wet. So, you know, watch out for that.
- If ever a movie needed a sequel, its Ferris Bueller's Day Off. I can't help but wonder whatever happened to that kid.
- My new defining characteristic of an alcoholic is a person who drinks screwdrivers for the vitamin c.
- My dumb friend Mike's thoughts on Global Warming: "What I don't get is scientists and meteorologists or whatever can't even predict the weather correctly for a solid week, so it just seems farfetched that they would know what could happen a hundreds of years from now." Sometimes, a simple mind can put things so eloquently.
- I am a hairy bastard, and I have always been a Gillette man. Mostly because when I was 15 years old and first started shaving (weekly, but fuck you, it was necessary), Gillette magically sent me a razor in the mail. I've never known how they knew it was time for me to get my own razor, but I've always respected them for being there for me. Also, a new second reason, the NE Patriots play at Gillette field. It was all very serendipitious if you ask me. And, I am nothing if not loyal.
And drunk. I'm usually drunk too.
- I have a feeling that with the way the teenage pregnancy rate is nowadays, GILFs are going to be a big thing in 15-20 years.
- And, on the subject of MILFs, as I get older, I start to question the MILF prerequisites. I mean, can a 16 year old with a child be considered a MILF? I think the broad has to be at least 15 years older than you to get MILF status, otherwise, its just a new creepy off-shoot of kiddie porn.
- Still on MILFs......I think in the future, MILF will become a way for teenagers to let their parents know they are ready for sex.
-Johnny: Mom, I'd like to fuck my girlfriend.
-Mom: Johnny! Have some manners! It's MILF my girlfriend.
- Its amazing to me how fast a friend can turn and break guy code when a hot chick wanting to touch his penis is involved.
- While in Hollywood, I expected to see hookers standing on every street corner. When I made a comment that I had not seen any yet, my friend pointed out that I must be retarded because they were "everywhere". Which leads me to one of two conclusions: A). Hookers dress like regular women, or B). All women dress like hookers. I'll let you decide.
- Does anyone outside the MLB believe in wearing a baseball cap the right way anymore?
- After the VTech shootings, a CNN news reporter revealed to the world that the grieving students at Virginia Tech had respectfully asked all of the media to go home so that the student body could heal in peace. This news was reported live from Blacksburg, at the campus of Virginia Tech. Sometimes, I hate people. I really do.
- A recent study shows that most college sororities discriminate against fat chicks. Also, in case you were wondering, rain has a tendency to get you wet. So, you know, watch out for that.
- If ever a movie needed a sequel, its Ferris Bueller's Day Off. I can't help but wonder whatever happened to that kid.
- My new defining characteristic of an alcoholic is a person who drinks screwdrivers for the vitamin c.
- My dumb friend Mike's thoughts on Global Warming: "What I don't get is scientists and meteorologists or whatever can't even predict the weather correctly for a solid week, so it just seems farfetched that they would know what could happen a hundreds of years from now." Sometimes, a simple mind can put things so eloquently.
- I am a hairy bastard, and I have always been a Gillette man. Mostly because when I was 15 years old and first started shaving (weekly, but fuck you, it was necessary), Gillette magically sent me a razor in the mail. I've never known how they knew it was time for me to get my own razor, but I've always respected them for being there for me. Also, a new second reason, the NE Patriots play at Gillette field. It was all very serendipitious if you ask me. And, I am nothing if not loyal.
And drunk. I'm usually drunk too.
sphenoid13:
GAROSSS! I hate the banana runts!
_pie_:
older women are MILFs, imo