cleric

Sometimes I wonder if I'm living in the age where our civilization is that of the end times. I look @ the world everyday when I wake up. Hunger, War, Poverity. We are the greatest country in the world. But democracy is failing. Not your average person on the street will say this. Most people will discredit this. I have so much love for my country. So much love for the human condition that is now. I want us to just stop and look. really look at the self-inflicted wounds we have given ourselves. Does no one see that we are sealing a doomed fate.

on a lighter note...I'm prolly going to shell out 250 dollars on Eharmony. I'm tired of being alone.

This website is actually very depressing. when you think about it. it's just another porn site. all but a few people here are all but numb to the mindless fluff and flesh that is SG. This site is nothing what it used to be. I remember when it was strictly woman ran, by Missy who started it. she had a good thing...But the types of girls that I see and talk to are no more that abercrombie models with dyed hair and a clip on piercing. it really makes me sick.

If only I could show how people see themselves. I'm tired of the hypocrites. I'm on a path here I'm very uncertain. It seems the more I understand the way things work, the more unappealing they are. why do we have to be so shallow. why do we have to be so materialistic. The reasoning of it compells me to put everyone I meet into a cateagory. The people that live thier life blindly, as long as they have thier freedoms they could care less about the rest of the world. There's the people that are in the grey area that aren't sure what to do, they know that there is more they could be doing, they are well aware of what is coming but refuse to do anything about itdue to fear of persecution and not being judeged. Then there's the few that live life acording to how the human condition progresses through history. The every flowing knowledge that our everday life is about a greater understanding of how we live our life.

I want it to be known, that my outlook on life is bias. why is it bias. Love. I having loving friends. Loving family. and I love them ll back. I love my country. I have so much compassion that I go out of my way to help people when ever I can so that I know that it did some justice. I've volunteered growing up, going on mission trips. Th look a total family gave you after rebuilding thier house cannot be described. I feel so bad that I must resort to feeling selfish. I know I am still young. but I want to know there's more to Love. I have longed that sweet kiss of a undieing love. To feel the warmth of it in my heart as well in my arms. I know in my eyes that it a true crime to wish for love. I've prayedfor Love. I've dreamt too many lonely nights where the sun's rays outlined a beauty that laid in wait.

I bitter. very bitter. cold as an old banker taking money to his grave. I let my tears turn hot. Let my sadness turn to hate. and this has been going on underneath me for far too long. but I will never this this dark side ever be
the best of me. I have too much pride to let something as petty as ill-longing for love hold me back. maybe someday it'll happen. but when it does I'll be waiting......