ive been stressed about my birthday since the beginning of the year lol. not about turning 30 because i'm actually excited about that part, but the rest is just...its like if you watch LOST, its sort of like the smoke monster. i was having guilt because my dad lost his job and they wanted to have party for me and i wouldnt let them, im not there responsibility <and then that brings in its own bag of trippy head games>, then i was told my party had to occur on sunday <yes football day-the 7th> which is my actual bday but silly to have a party that day due to uh gee THE SUPERBOWL. then i was told my brother and his BITCH 
of a fiance could only be there between such and such because they were having a superbowl party. so im like oh and you didnt invite me, on my BIRTHDAY? oh my god. he planned his superbowl party and not my bday. like they dont even care. our family is tiny. its me and him. he told me i had to make more of an effort, so ive been emailing and calling constantly < i mean i started to feel l ike a stalker> but she couldnt figure out a <date> for us 4 to hang out. she wants me in her wedding but has my brother ask me? i feel like i am in high school and she is one of those chicks, she does NOT like me. i annoy her, piss her off, make her gag or what the fuck ever. im so sick of fighting to get a hold in my family. i have been so SO wracked with guilt its making my physically ill, i mean we wont even touch THE MENTAL PART. and the only person who understands every bit of this oddly enough is my husband.
on a side note, my dad just turned 50 and a week before found out he isnt able to work in steel anymore or he could be parlyzed, its a long story but the jist is he cant work. therefore no money. therefore someone needs to help them. and my brother comes over boasting this story about how sarah <> spent 8 grand 8 FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKING GRAND on her wedding dress. and my parents dont even have milk. what the motherfuciking hell is going on. it has to be body snatchers, cuz there is no FUCKING WAY my brother could let all that go down. i mean, im on disability i get 300 a month. lmao 300. i cant help anyone.
i have no idea what is going on. i dont know how someone can do that. and be pissed off at my dad for having spinal surgery near his wedding.
hold
me
back
i'm certifiable you sons of bitches, i can blame it all on the illness. i will rip you fucking shreds.
see you on sunday
of a fiance could only be there between such and such because they were having a superbowl party. so im like oh and you didnt invite me, on my BIRTHDAY? oh my god. he planned his superbowl party and not my bday. like they dont even care. our family is tiny. its me and him. he told me i had to make more of an effort, so ive been emailing and calling constantly < i mean i started to feel l ike a stalker> but she couldnt figure out a <date> for us 4 to hang out. she wants me in her wedding but has my brother ask me? i feel like i am in high school and she is one of those chicks, she does NOT like me. i annoy her, piss her off, make her gag or what the fuck ever. im so sick of fighting to get a hold in my family. i have been so SO wracked with guilt its making my physically ill, i mean we wont even touch THE MENTAL PART. and the only person who understands every bit of this oddly enough is my husband.
on a side note, my dad just turned 50 and a week before found out he isnt able to work in steel anymore or he could be parlyzed, its a long story but the jist is he cant work. therefore no money. therefore someone needs to help them. and my brother comes over boasting this story about how sarah <
> spent 8 grand 8 FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKING GRAND on her wedding dress. and my parents dont even have milk. what the motherfuciking hell is going on. it has to be body snatchers, cuz there is no FUCKING WAY my brother could let all that go down. i mean, im on disability i get 300 a month. lmao 300. i cant help anyone.
i have no idea what is going on. i dont know how someone can do that. and be pissed off at my dad for having spinal surgery near his wedding.
hold
me
back
i'm certifiable you sons of bitches, i can blame it all on the illness. i will rip you fucking shreds.
see you on sunday
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
happy birthday i wanna be one of the first to wish you a great year mamacita you deserve it. i hope things get better with the family, i fucking HATE family drama with such a crazy vengance as you know.
save me, save u
wedding dress that's 8k is about the stupidest thing i've ever heard.
anyhow...take care hon.