clarkekid

I've been a bit pissed for most of the day at certain people. Here's the basic situation... I come up with an idea to do something that would be fun. I approach people with similar interests who agree it would be fun and say they would like to do it as well. Now keep in mind, I'm not talking about doing things as a group. It is multiple different events with different people involved. There is nothing date-like involvedin any of these since in some cases the other person is not female. But... I go through the effort of getting the basics organized and all that is left is selectiing a day. Upon approaching said individuals, I receive a response of some lame cop out excuse as to why they can't. Now for the most part the cop out usually involves money which can be understandible, but since not that long of a time period has passed since I initially asked them, shouldn't they have known that money would be an issue before agreeing to the plan?

What I'm getting at is people who I had considered friends not being able to tell me the truth. If you want a sure fire way to piss me off, it's lie to me. I don't care if it's something as simple as trying to spare my feelings and telling me "I don't feel like doing it" right off. I'm a big boy... I can handle and accept hearing "no". But I can't handle a "yes" and then some made up excuse to get out of it. Lying to me give me the impression of a HUGE lack of respect for me. Now, please do not say I'm probably making more of this than it is because in one such situation I just witnessed a person who backed out of something making the EXACT SAME PLANS with someone else... the same plans they apparently "couldn't afford". AND the plans I had set up would have been cheaper because I have access to things that would be free and cut out some of the expenses dramatically... AND this person knew this. How can I NOT take this personal?

I have to say, that once a so-called friend lies to me I begin to pull away. I start talking to them less and less because all I can think of is how little my friendship means to them... that they couldn't tell me the truth. AND the funny thing isthat they never even notice it until suddenly the realize we aren't talking at all anymore and they wonder what happened. And no, I don't confront them on the lie because this just gives them another opportunity to deny it and lie all over again making the situation worse.

I'm a firm believer in actions speaking louder than words. Anyone can talk a big game, but when their actions don't back it up I see who they truely are and exactly what I mean to them. I will NOT be patronized... I will NOT be someone's stand-by friend when there is nothing else better to do or no one more interesting to talk to. I have more self-respect than that.

This has happened enough in my life to recognize it and had happened enough recently that the recent bit of information I witnessed yesterday just threw me into a bit of anger over the whole thing. Sorry you all had to read this. If you got this far, I'm impressed. But I've hit the point where I'm fed up and calling Shananigans on all these so-called friends in my life... to get it off my chest and move on.

The moral of this is... I respect honesty... never lie to me, it will always make your situation worse and my opinion of you drop. Trust me... once you start to lose any respect from me, it's VERY hard to get it back.

Now that that is off my chest, it may seem a little petty. I know there are lots more people with greater problems out there. Even as I type this, I'm thinking of a couple of my friends who are having a hard time and how I might be able to help them out. I prefer to put my friends' problems ahead of my own. But this simple petty thing means A LOT to me. It actually helps me determine who is a REAL friend and deserves my attention when they need help.