cindi_slaughter

blah
1:25am
i cant sleep
i just start thinking about things i cant control things i cant change
i think thats what frustrates me the most, when i cant control things
when i dont know whats going on
i had nothing to do with it yet it affects me and torments me and i cant control it
forgive and forget
i know people makes mistakes
i've made mistakes but
somedays i dont hardly think about it at all but somedays it just eats at me
blah
i just wish i could forget about it ya know
just forget all about it
its easier to forgive than to forget, will i ever forget?
i just wonder if this could ever happen again
blah blah blah blah
i feel like im always suspecting things now and i dont want to
i dont know
i wish i had someone to talk to
i just think i need to get this all out and that that would help me start to forget about everything
i want to forget
im tired
i just want to be happy
really happy
i dont want things to change
im just tired

sometimes i feel like i dont know myself
like if i lost everything i have
what would be left?
who would i be?
im happy dont get me wrong but what if something happens and i lose what i've got and who i've got
what would be left
what would happen next
who would i be?
sometimes i feel like i have everything in the world
everything i could want right now
but then i think what if i lost it?
then i would have nothing
nothing and that is harsh
i think im just a little down
just thinking on the crappy side of what could happen
im just being silly
i just feel like i could lose it at anytime
uuhgg
oh dear