So as much as I love trashy sex, long drug fueled nights of dancing and grinding, as much as I've broke people up, slept with people with boyfriends (and girlfriends), broke taboos, and committed enough sins that I'll still go to hell with a papal pardon and crave voodoo, violence, and passion, I still have a soft soft for love.
I confess. I'm in the same boat and I've never been able to describe it so perfectly. Thank you.
I don't know what's going on with me. I jus don't.
I hate when I don't understand something unless it's mathematics.
I wanna quit university. But I graduate in December. I don't wanna do Bar School, but it's not really an option as I can't do nothing with a degree in Law over here.
I'm not sure about my man and me anymore. I love him. He loves me. But we live on different planets. Me in Quebec city and working too much. Him at work with conflictual and non regular niether stable schedules. Me wanting to party, him falling asleep between midnight and 1am at every party we go. Me wanting to try new things in our sexual life like anal, 3somes (with 2 boys or 2 girls, I wanna do both anyway), him not really wanting so and being really conservator about all this. But still, he loves me very much, he makes me feel important and like he cares a lot about me. I do care about him too and love him very much.
My mom who's completly obsessed with me becoming the best lawyer ever and me not being able to imagine myself as a lawyer, and also me not wanting to deceive my mum cuz she's my only family since my father... well... anyway it's not like I ever had a father for real cuz the love of his life is named Alcohol.
2 friends of mine being attracted by me and trying to fuck me lately... me, resisting but I've been thinking about one of them for more than 2 years (only for sex, but I must admit it sure doesn't help the situation with my man...)
And me feeling down 3 hours out of 4. I feel like I'm becoming emo... which makes me hate myself even more and I get even more depressed.
But I don't wanna look like I'm complaining cuz I'm not. I mean, I have everything to be happy.
It's just that I'm not.
But I'm spoiled with ppl who love me and care about me and help me with my life.
I'm so stressed out about all this that I've had my periods 3 times since xmas, and I usually have 'em once every like 3 months...
If anyone can help me out, I'd appreciate it.
(I guess that means you're healed so you can drink beer again - your piercing I mean)