So, after much pain and suffering, I have finally managed to purge my body of the vile sickness that had befallen me. Coming down with a cold is utterly awful, when it only happens to you once every 3 or 4 years.
It seems to have come with some positive reinforcement, however, as I feel rather rested and alive once again... although...
Some part of me, however, can still not shake the thoughts of Alicia.. it's been near 6 months.. and with every breath I take, I taste her.. lingering...
Every thought, voluntary or not, radiates with the warmness that I so dearly miss... a warmth that I have not felt since I had her in my life...
And every moment, I hate it more.
That aside, I've fallen back to the basics that used to drive my being. I finally managed to have the emotional strength to turn on my Itunes and listen. I had a cup of tea, and it hurt a little bit less.
Have any of you ever given up true love for an easier ride? Am I a total buffoon for my choice? Or was I right to maintain a 5 year marriage, over a fling which ultimately my soul mate?
Fuck, I don't know.. but it hurts.. and much to my surprise, it feels amazing... the emotion makes me breathe with new meaning... and daydream forever of what might have been...
It seems to have come with some positive reinforcement, however, as I feel rather rested and alive once again... although...
Some part of me, however, can still not shake the thoughts of Alicia.. it's been near 6 months.. and with every breath I take, I taste her.. lingering...
Every thought, voluntary or not, radiates with the warmness that I so dearly miss... a warmth that I have not felt since I had her in my life...
And every moment, I hate it more.
That aside, I've fallen back to the basics that used to drive my being. I finally managed to have the emotional strength to turn on my Itunes and listen. I had a cup of tea, and it hurt a little bit less.
Have any of you ever given up true love for an easier ride? Am I a total buffoon for my choice? Or was I right to maintain a 5 year marriage, over a fling which ultimately my soul mate?
Fuck, I don't know.. but it hurts.. and much to my surprise, it feels amazing... the emotion makes me breathe with new meaning... and daydream forever of what might have been...