There was something about you, and underlying desire and a current of daringness that you always tried to hide. Those late night texts telling me of your dreams were amazing. The one with you, and me, and the friend, what was it, in the local park at night, when I did.... And he did... and you liked it all?

We never did explore those possibilities, damn! There was the time I took you from behind, while you were hanging out the window, middle of the day, and the window in your little flat was wide open, and you told me after you wanted to finish me off in your mouth! To everyone, you were a mousey plainly dressed girl, but like you told me recently, I managed to bring you out your shell, and now you're strong and confident. The tales you told me of your oral skills recently, well left me hot and bothered... heh heh!

And we never got those photos done. We had plans didn't we, you, stockings, boots, long coat, on the railway platform. We had so much fun together. I recall the night you just stripped off and straddled me on the sofa, and you were pulling on your nipples of your truly amazing breasts, and you guided my hand down to find you were so smooth. Damn, that was a night; especially when you got out the bag from Ann Summers... remember that bottle of BK DR PLS? ha ha! What a night.

Tho the time you and I parked up, and steamed up the windows? I tell you, NO-ONE has ever soaked me like that; I was stunned where all that wetness came from. I've been trying to find someone else who can do that for a long time now!

Oh the time you turned up at mine late and drunk.. we had to cut the straps off your top cos you'd tied them too tight. All you wanted that night was just dirty rough sex, and photos to prove it. And to be worn like a glove puppet. Dirty girl...

Oh how you wept the time we made love while camping in Heysham, you'd just got back from LA and we went away. It was a first family holiday, not the last, but one of the happiest. Illness and depression seemed to sour the others. For you anyway it seems.

The night I cut my leg open on that metal pirate sign was amazing. You'd been texting me all night while I was out, flirty stuff, nothing filthy, but you know flirty always works best for me, but I filled up on whiskey (to make me frisky), and you were in bed, in stockings. There were spankings a plenty, and amazing sex. I won't go into detail.....

I always wanted you, and I will miss you, but you will know where I am. I don't have to like your decision but, because I love you, I have to respect it, and leave you to it.

Maybe one day you'll change your mind again, and even more remotely, you'll maybe let me know you've changed your mind. I'll still be here.