Sleep has always been an issue of mine and something I can’t seem to sort out. My body skips the REM cycle due to some conditioning after years of horrific dreams as a child. That being said I find myself waking up often around 3am, or I simply stay awake until very late where I no longer have time to fall into REM. Along with some other chaotic habits that contribute to an out of place schedule.. if you could really call it that.
For example, I fell asleep around 9:30pm woke up at 11:45pm. I’ve been awake since & it is now 2:50am hehe. I’ll head to sleep, or at least try to, in a bit but have to wake up again around 6am... or at least try to. (;
I’m trying to work on it.. but it’s a mental & physical thing that go hand in hand. I’m actually looking into getting into therapy with a therapist who maybe specializes in dreams/sleep. With my childhood sleep as I mentioned, I developed a type of sleep anxiety so it’s not necessarily I don’t get tired, I just don’t want to sleep.
Due to the sleep anxiety causing my sleep to be all whack it actually threw me off physically too! Turns out after some blood tests and trips to the doctor.. my metabolism doesn’t work properly! Although it processes everything I eat it doesn’t turn any of that into any type of fuel for my body. I never gain or lose weight and I don’t retain any energy, everything just dissipates. Which obviously doesn’t help with the whole sleep thing either :) I’m always tired, but I hardly sleep! When I do, it’s always broken up.. I can’t sleep through the night. And although people say you always dream you just don’t remember them, I truthfully don’t! My body refuses to allow my mind to reach that point. Other than rare occasion.
Interesting, no?
I want to start keeping a detailed sleep journal, perhaps I’ll share it with you some time! I find this stuff very interesting as I love psychology and I hope one day I can figure it out. ✨
Until then.. sweet dreams to you! & wishful thinking for me 😅💚
Xoxo
