cheech

"In the early grades of school I learned that boys must be all boy (rough-and-tumble, combative), girls must be all girl (frilly, domestic, artistic, compassionate, and hopefully not too bright), and any whiff of the androgynous is verboten. I was taught early that winning and being right are necessary in all circumstances; losing is, like peer disapproval, a kind of death. I learned that I must depend on others for love, approval, and validation in order to merit any degree of worth and happiness (a belief that, if you think about it, is a kind of slavery).
Insofar as societys tenets create conformity and order in a largely chaotic world, they are obviously useful and necessary. But I can now see that just as obviously these beliefs and mythologies so deeply imprinted in my brain eventually inhibit my longing for psychological and spiritual truth, for self-discovery. In the long run, conformity doesnt elevate me to wisdom, it puts me to sleep.
Every day I encounter evidence of my preprogrammed thought patterns and beliefs that remain unexamined and therefore continue to obstruct my openhearted love of life. All the indoctrinations of my youth still linger in the corners of my mind. My job now is to embrace these learned and often arbitrary thought patterns, fears, and prejudices, with awareness and inquiry, to dissolve them in the light of love and understanding. The examined life is the only life worth living, and the reality of what is is the only place worth living for."

-- Richard Chamberlain, Shattered Love: A Memoir