chckpotpie

I love the television. Let me tell you why this was such a great invention...it allows me to escape my own life and enter that of another individual/family.
I have been watching a great deal of television lately. This is because my own life does not satisfy me as it is currently. I know...this is an old subject that has been shot and killed...but i think i finally figured out why i'm so unhappy:
I've had a Revalation:

I want a relationship.(again, I know...old subject) However, the reason this affects me so much now and it never did before is because I have finally realized that I am gay. Before...when I was younger, relationships didn't matter to me because I didn't get any satisfaction out of "dating" (guys that is). I would just go about my daily life thinking that that was the way things were going to be. I was easily satisfied by straight A's in school and going to bed at 9. A lifestyle I don't keep completely anymore. (obviously...it's 1am right now)
Once I realized my sexuality and was in a happy relationship, I noticed a comfort that I had never felt before. An anxiousness combined with a constant yearn for her. I had never been like this with a guy.
SO... In Conclusion...1.)now that i've had that, and I know that there is such happiness in the world, I want it again.
I don't think any amount of studying or hobbies could distract me from this constant thought. 2.)The television offers a portal to worlds that do not exist. (point? i'm working on it.) 3.)It's on!

P.S. This will probably be deleted within the next couple of days when I wake up, read it, and think "what the fuck was I thinking??" Things always seem different in the middle of the night.