charlize

I am so miserably sick...with a cold. I seem to have caught it from a woman that I work with. She was VERY VERY sick. If I don't get better they will have to postpone my surgery. I want to get it over with, so this isn't making me too happy. I know I could get better if I could rest, but with work and a bunch of stuff I need to do before the surgery it doesn't seem possible.

Then the stupid guy I am dating is being a dick about the whole thing because I need to get better and he is all pissy because I don't want to hang out tomorrow night. He just wants to go see a movie, but I feel so terrible I want to crawl in a hole and die. It's bad enough to be in chronic pain, but with a cold its sooooo much worse. Everytime I cough or sneeze it hurts even more. I really liked the guy yesterday; now I think he is insensitive and an asshole. My phone died when I was talking to him, so I need to call him back. It is going to bug me until I get a resolution.

Sometimes I sit and wonder, "What the fuck did I do?" I obviously have bad karma. I have my whole life. The ironic thing is that all this shitty stuff happened to me growing up and I always get the same comments: that I have such a good attitude about things...blah, blah, blah. It's only because I have always had faith everything would get better. No matter how hard I try that doesn't happen. I am starting to lose hope.

Yes, I know, a little melodramatic over a cold...