Discussion...the concept of cheating
I would submit that in society, women tend to hold more of an emotional attachment to the act of sex then men would. To women, the act of sex is a sensual experience that forms a bond between two people. Now, I am not saying that all women feel this way, but i am saying that the majority of women feel this way.
To men, the act of sex is a way to fulfill desires and an eternal need to satiate a primal urge that plagues us constantly. Some times, its stronger than others, and i changes with age and status and stress levels...etc, but the fact of the matter is to men, the need to be fulfilled is a constant thought process....even if its subconscious.
Now I am no saying all men feel this way, but I would submit that the majority of men feel this way. Willpower and control help to keep these urges in check.
I would also submit that our sexual desires must be constantly controlled and that these desires are something we battle with all our lives however, men experience these desires far more acutely than women due in general. NOTE-in general refers to day to day experience. One might say that women experience sexual desire just as strongly as men do...and that may be the case, but on a day to day basis, I submit that men experience it more often then women due.
There is many documented reasons for this. One being that biologically, women are bred to have nurturing instincts. Men are bred for passing on their genes. The struggle to control mens hormones, fueled by testosterone, is not by any means a product of our own inability to control our urges....there is a biological element to it.
Women can control their hormones easier because of the lack of testosterone as well as because for women, biologically speaking, once they have found the right mate, sex only needs to occur with him until a child is conceived.
There is also a competition factor. Men compete with other men to pass on their genes. This is why we are horny so much. It increases the chance that we will have sex and therefore, impregnate a woman.
simply put...men find women that are physically fit and healthy and women find men that are the same as well as that can provide for them.
The second reason may be that women are much more pleasing physically then men are. In today's society this is reinforced by the push for skinny bodies and attractiveness as well as for the drive to sell clothing that accentuates the parts of the body that men find tantalizing.
Now, we need to clarify on a couple of things. First, this discussion is on cheating. So, with that in mind, we have to assume that the couple has established a relationship and formed a bond between each other.
Now I am not here to discuss who cheats more, men or women. I am here to discuss the reasons behind cheating.
Since men generally do not hold a emotional attachment to sex AT THE BEGINNING, a man can easily (in my opinion of course) have a one night stand and still fully love the woman whom he is cheating on. A man cheats in order to fulfill a sexual desire that is primal in nature. Cheating only admits that the man is not in control of his desires or that a woman has sufficiently lured the man to commit the act.
Make no mistake...women have the power to seduce many times more than a man does. She just has more ammunition for the job, And unless the man is completely enthralled in the women he is with (I.E.-a new relationship or a relationship that fulfills the mans needs in every way.) then there is a woman out there with the capability to take a a man from the woman he is with.
Women cheat because they lose the emotional attachment more than physical attraction. Although physical attraction plays a role in drawing a woman to bed with a guy, the initial bond forms emotionally before the act of sex is made. It is opposite with men. For women, especially with all the diseases out there and psychotic men, the physical attraction might be there, but a guy has to wow the woman mentally as well. Remember...this is a discussion on cheating in established relationships. Generally speaking, in an established relationship, a women wouldn't go to a night club and pick up the first cute guy she sees.
However, a guy might, and easily go back and tell the girl he is with that he loves her, and it would be true.
In any case, cheating occurs most often when someone in the relationship is unfulfilled. It tends to be because men aren't sexually fulfilled and women aren't emotionally fulfilled. But this is not always the case, just most often.. In either case, we have to ask ourselves...if you have to pick one, which one is worse.
The answer to that is that it is more detrimental to the relationship when a woman cheats.
I believe you can understand why. When a women cheats, she is fulfilling a mental need as well as a physical one. When a man cheats, he is fulfilling a physical desire. He might find the woman fascinating and damn smart, but getting her in bed still is the number one priority AT THE BEGINNING. And continued cheating with that same women means there is trouble. Because the guy then starts to form a bond with the woman, finding a way to fulfill emotional needs that are not being met at home.
its a simple bonding game...women bond faster emotionally then guys do.
Thats all for now. I look forward to your opinions.
I would submit that in society, women tend to hold more of an emotional attachment to the act of sex then men would. To women, the act of sex is a sensual experience that forms a bond between two people. Now, I am not saying that all women feel this way, but i am saying that the majority of women feel this way.
To men, the act of sex is a way to fulfill desires and an eternal need to satiate a primal urge that plagues us constantly. Some times, its stronger than others, and i changes with age and status and stress levels...etc, but the fact of the matter is to men, the need to be fulfilled is a constant thought process....even if its subconscious.
Now I am no saying all men feel this way, but I would submit that the majority of men feel this way. Willpower and control help to keep these urges in check.
I would also submit that our sexual desires must be constantly controlled and that these desires are something we battle with all our lives however, men experience these desires far more acutely than women due in general. NOTE-in general refers to day to day experience. One might say that women experience sexual desire just as strongly as men do...and that may be the case, but on a day to day basis, I submit that men experience it more often then women due.
There is many documented reasons for this. One being that biologically, women are bred to have nurturing instincts. Men are bred for passing on their genes. The struggle to control mens hormones, fueled by testosterone, is not by any means a product of our own inability to control our urges....there is a biological element to it.
Women can control their hormones easier because of the lack of testosterone as well as because for women, biologically speaking, once they have found the right mate, sex only needs to occur with him until a child is conceived.
There is also a competition factor. Men compete with other men to pass on their genes. This is why we are horny so much. It increases the chance that we will have sex and therefore, impregnate a woman.
simply put...men find women that are physically fit and healthy and women find men that are the same as well as that can provide for them.
The second reason may be that women are much more pleasing physically then men are. In today's society this is reinforced by the push for skinny bodies and attractiveness as well as for the drive to sell clothing that accentuates the parts of the body that men find tantalizing.
Now, we need to clarify on a couple of things. First, this discussion is on cheating. So, with that in mind, we have to assume that the couple has established a relationship and formed a bond between each other.
Now I am not here to discuss who cheats more, men or women. I am here to discuss the reasons behind cheating.
Since men generally do not hold a emotional attachment to sex AT THE BEGINNING, a man can easily (in my opinion of course) have a one night stand and still fully love the woman whom he is cheating on. A man cheats in order to fulfill a sexual desire that is primal in nature. Cheating only admits that the man is not in control of his desires or that a woman has sufficiently lured the man to commit the act.
Make no mistake...women have the power to seduce many times more than a man does. She just has more ammunition for the job, And unless the man is completely enthralled in the women he is with (I.E.-a new relationship or a relationship that fulfills the mans needs in every way.) then there is a woman out there with the capability to take a a man from the woman he is with.
Women cheat because they lose the emotional attachment more than physical attraction. Although physical attraction plays a role in drawing a woman to bed with a guy, the initial bond forms emotionally before the act of sex is made. It is opposite with men. For women, especially with all the diseases out there and psychotic men, the physical attraction might be there, but a guy has to wow the woman mentally as well. Remember...this is a discussion on cheating in established relationships. Generally speaking, in an established relationship, a women wouldn't go to a night club and pick up the first cute guy she sees.
However, a guy might, and easily go back and tell the girl he is with that he loves her, and it would be true.
In any case, cheating occurs most often when someone in the relationship is unfulfilled. It tends to be because men aren't sexually fulfilled and women aren't emotionally fulfilled. But this is not always the case, just most often.. In either case, we have to ask ourselves...if you have to pick one, which one is worse.
The answer to that is that it is more detrimental to the relationship when a woman cheats.
I believe you can understand why. When a women cheats, she is fulfilling a mental need as well as a physical one. When a man cheats, he is fulfilling a physical desire. He might find the woman fascinating and damn smart, but getting her in bed still is the number one priority AT THE BEGINNING. And continued cheating with that same women means there is trouble. Because the guy then starts to form a bond with the woman, finding a way to fulfill emotional needs that are not being met at home.
its a simple bonding game...women bond faster emotionally then guys do.
Thats all for now. I look forward to your opinions.
mizoo:
Gender does not define your actions or your emotions. I know that my boyfriends have always been far mushier than me and never open to sex with other people, couldn't stand the though. I think that's two solid holes in your story.
annika:
Isn't it?! 