Amelie's friends say I'm creepy. She doesn't like them, anyhow, but they're good for a laugh. I couldn't possibly be as perfect as she says I am, they contend, plus, you know, the whole internet thing. Why would someone so far away be so nice? Probably because no one around her is nice, with very few exceptions. She and I think her friends are jealous. But I guess it's hard for them, living their lives within the confines and mindsets of shows like Oprah and "Sex and the City." And don't even get them started on her running off to New York to meet me this winter.

Sheesh.

I have to go to the dentist today. That frightens lots of people, but it's just a check up. I haven't been afraid of the dentist since I went to Dr. Bender as a child. If I can survive a Nazi scientist with a handlebar moustache posing as a children's dentist...