chaosmachine

The weekends jubilation ended with mondays' stark plunge into reality and self loathing.....I seem to find the most inoppurtune times to sink into a apathetic mood for hours....Why must i endure so? I really am getting tired of it , really, really, really tired of it. On top of that I've been questioning my own intelect, one thign that for the longest i always held in high regard., well i dunno maybe my overly paranoid thoughts leaked out at a higher volume then normal, but it is so self defeating, just steeping in self pity and apathy, i feel al clammy and irratated, all i want to to do is lay here and rot.