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chad

Newbury

SG Since 2011

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Struggling

May 14, 2015
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My confidence levels are pretty low lately. Particularly with my creative side. Im 3 days away from finishing my second year at uni. I feel like I've completely lost myself as an artist. Everyone else in my course seems to be moving forward, discovering their style or improving. I feel stuck in a state of mediocrity. I'm neither here nor there. I don't have a style. I don't have a direction. I thought I'd discover what kind of illustrator I'd want to be through this course. But it's had the opposite effect.

It's effecting my cosplay making too.

I have been trying to finish this Thor cosplay for MCM London Comic Con next week. I was really happy with how it was coming along when I took these photos. But now, the more I look at it. The more I allow myself to think about it. The more I think "it's not good enough, it'll never be good enough, so why bother?". I want to rip it apart and throw it in the bin, or burn it. Whatever.

I can normally shake this off with a good night's sleep. Not completely but I was taught how to not let negative thoughts consume me through therapy and counselling. But I'm having one of those times where I'm really struggling to ignore it. 😔 I've let the thought of worthlessness embed itself.

VIEW 19 of 19 COMMENTS
robsnow:
hahaha epic!
Jun 4, 2015
phase2creations:
Dude, as an artist I totally and completely understand what you are talking about. I get into space where I feel like everything I draw or make just can't reach the standard in my head. I do want to say that I love your artwork, you are an excellent sketch artist and your foam armor looks great :) But I know what you're saying, it's how YOU feel about your work, right? Although I haven't found a real cure for it, whenever I get like this I try these things: Try a whole new method (Perhaps attempt a clay sculpt of some armor, then make a mold of it and cast in rubber!), Go on a long hike in a brand new location, and/or go to your perfect inspiration place (ie. A creepy old mansion, misty lake at night, beach on a sunny day, etc.), Take a total creative break (always a good one), try something else you haven't done (ie. write a short story, take some photos, scultpting, photoshop lessons, etc.) and if all else fails try something like Martial arts, wrestling, rock climbing or something real physical. It really helps get the frustrations out lol. Anyway, I think you're amazing and I hope this helps :) HAVE A GREAT DAY!
Jun 17, 2015

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