cereal_killer

yay for me! i got the assistant meat market manager position... now i will have enough cash to pay bills and maybe even enjoy myself and go out with friends once in a while.

and now for the emo portion of our show:

how can i look to the future if i'm dwelling in the past?
why is it that lately anything and everything reminds me of her? hell, i can't even watch lilo & stitch without thinking of her. why after everything that happened would i even be thinking that i want her back? am i a glutton for punishment or a sucker for romance? the biggest problem is that no matter how i try and wrap my brain around all of this i still come back to the same solution... i still love her. the only problem is then i get to thinking maybe that's not the solution, but the problem instead. how do you stop loving someone? i'm not sure if i can. how do i know that she's stopped loving me? why don't i just forget about her and move on? why am i babbling? the problem is we've been through so much together... good and bad... and even after everything we are still good friends. i'm afraid to tell her how i feel because i'm afraid it will jeopardize our friendship, but if i don't tell her i'll never know. i wish things could be simple, but they hardly ever are. if things were simple than they would not be worth nearly as much in the end. i hate feeling lost like this, but it just won't go away. i'm going to stop writing now, or i might never stop.

C_K