This is off by buddy's myspace... and if you knew him...you would laugh your ass off....until you peed yourself.
Heres a list of character flaws that have led to almost every broad I meet hating me.
1. If I go out with you not only will I look at other women I will also comment on them if I feel the need arises.
2. I love dead baby jokes, while not always a problem I have a tendancy to tell them in front of women who just had an abortion or who have lost a kid. Oops my bad.
3. I think this whole pregnancy thing is over rated. You wouldnt be congratulating me if I looked like a walrus for 9 months, why should I congratulate you?
4. I drink to excess.
5. I refer to the Mentally Challenged as retards.
6. I love porn and strippers. I frequently bring the two up in conversation.
7. I love bestiality and again I frequently bring it up in conversation. Before you get the wrong idea I dont watch it to get off. I just think that there is nothing funnier than a chick fucking a horse.
8. I have a tendancy to call women dude, for some reason they dont like this.
9. When I first meet a woman I automatically think Im smarter than she is. The thing about this is Im usually right.
10. Im fucking violent.
11. I use fuck every other word and if someone asks me to stop out of respect to them I will incorporate fuck into every word I say.
12. I generally dont remember womens names because honestly its not important to me. I prefer to give wommen nicknames so I can better remember them. Such as chick with herpes, Red shirt girl, slutbag.
13. If your unfortunate enough to sleep with me, at some point during intercourse I always scream "Beware the flying dutchman"
14. Ive been known to drunk dial, alot.
15. If I see an animal crossing the road when Im driving, Im going to make every attempt to hit it.
16. I frequently bring up the color and consitensy of my last shit in conversation.
This is just a starter so if you have any observations feel free to let me know
and these were observations we made...
i got some that have been neglected
1. Sometimes you're willing to fight to the death and round up all your friends for an enemy not seen, unknown even to you, and you end up passing out in dirty clothes hamper
2. You do everything better at a bell curve of being drunk. when peaked it's rediculous and annoying (such as dancing on hands, rapping, witty come backs, and hitting on chilis waitresses), but once it starts sloping down, all bets are off and some one needs to lock you in a closet till morninng.
3. as stated before the only women you treat like women (or broads) are chilies waitreses, they love you, unfortunatley you don't view them as women so no true romance shall ever come.
4. i doubt you would have a problem punching a pregnet women, just to satisfy a dare.
5. two words appel tini
6. if some serious of events happens and women takes you back to their place, you would be unbelievably hammered, wake up, panic, probably kill her, and then call the police to find you while wondering through the woods.
7. you're beard is soft, chicks dig that. it's the one kudos i can offer
the guy who posted this...is one of my most trusted and loyal friends. amazing...i miss him...
Heres a list of character flaws that have led to almost every broad I meet hating me.
1. If I go out with you not only will I look at other women I will also comment on them if I feel the need arises.
2. I love dead baby jokes, while not always a problem I have a tendancy to tell them in front of women who just had an abortion or who have lost a kid. Oops my bad.
3. I think this whole pregnancy thing is over rated. You wouldnt be congratulating me if I looked like a walrus for 9 months, why should I congratulate you?
4. I drink to excess.
5. I refer to the Mentally Challenged as retards.
6. I love porn and strippers. I frequently bring the two up in conversation.
7. I love bestiality and again I frequently bring it up in conversation. Before you get the wrong idea I dont watch it to get off. I just think that there is nothing funnier than a chick fucking a horse.
8. I have a tendancy to call women dude, for some reason they dont like this.
9. When I first meet a woman I automatically think Im smarter than she is. The thing about this is Im usually right.
10. Im fucking violent.
11. I use fuck every other word and if someone asks me to stop out of respect to them I will incorporate fuck into every word I say.
12. I generally dont remember womens names because honestly its not important to me. I prefer to give wommen nicknames so I can better remember them. Such as chick with herpes, Red shirt girl, slutbag.
13. If your unfortunate enough to sleep with me, at some point during intercourse I always scream "Beware the flying dutchman"
14. Ive been known to drunk dial, alot.
15. If I see an animal crossing the road when Im driving, Im going to make every attempt to hit it.
16. I frequently bring up the color and consitensy of my last shit in conversation.
This is just a starter so if you have any observations feel free to let me know
and these were observations we made...
i got some that have been neglected
1. Sometimes you're willing to fight to the death and round up all your friends for an enemy not seen, unknown even to you, and you end up passing out in dirty clothes hamper
2. You do everything better at a bell curve of being drunk. when peaked it's rediculous and annoying (such as dancing on hands, rapping, witty come backs, and hitting on chilis waitresses), but once it starts sloping down, all bets are off and some one needs to lock you in a closet till morninng.
3. as stated before the only women you treat like women (or broads) are chilies waitreses, they love you, unfortunatley you don't view them as women so no true romance shall ever come.
4. i doubt you would have a problem punching a pregnet women, just to satisfy a dare.
5. two words appel tini
6. if some serious of events happens and women takes you back to their place, you would be unbelievably hammered, wake up, panic, probably kill her, and then call the police to find you while wondering through the woods.
7. you're beard is soft, chicks dig that. it's the one kudos i can offer
the guy who posted this...is one of my most trusted and loyal friends. amazing...i miss him...
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
nivoldoog:
looks like I mite be joining you cats over there...
veronika:
Thanks much for the support on my set! It's appreciated 