catiedid

There is a lot of sadness in my house. The residue left behind as the hurt and anger begin to melt away. Since the drama has died down we are able to have rational, although emotionally charged, tear-inducing conversations. You know the conversations that leave you emotionally spent. Where you each find the courage to say what needs to be said no matter the consequences of the words.

I guess it was just over a year ago I wrote in my journal
you gotta love life when all fuck breaks lose.
That statement started a chain reaction of numerous all fuck breaking lose Two lives torn apart by choices and actions, desperately trying to choose the best path forward. The concern isnt so much for one another, well be fine, but for our children: always the innocent victims of decisions and selfishness of adults. It has been a long year. But the timeline had to be created by us, for us. Its hard for outside eyes to understand where we are and why we are making the decisions we feel we must. There is always fear and always the possibility of regret. But so much better when it can be discussed, rationally, two adults with a common goal of doing what is right.

This morning as I was sitting in my car outside Starbucks, listening to the rain envelope my car, and Death Cab singing to me I was overcome with sadness. We all must suffer the consequences of our actions.

Walking out of Starbucks, coffee in hand, I stood beside my car and let the rain fall upon me. Just a slight chill in the drops, on the edge of warm spring rain with the promise of hot summer rains that dreams are made of.