catiedid

"Imagine then a dancer who, after long study, prayer and inspiration, has attained such a degree of understanding that his body is simply the luminous manifestation of his soul; whose body dances in accordance with a music heard inwardly, in an expression of something out of another, profounder world. This is the truly creative dancer; natural but not imitative, speaking in movement out of himself and out of something greater than all selves."
Isadora Duncan
The Philosopher's Stone of Dancing, 1920

A conversation I had yesterday has me dwelling on dance. Dwelling on my past as a dancer and the dream I once had but never went after. Some dreams are just that, dreams, and that is how they are meant to remain. In my life, dance was to always remain a dream. I began dancing when I was 3. I studied dance in college for 3 1/2 years before freaking out at the possibility of being a waitress for the rest of my life and I changed my major. Dance for me now is something I do in the privacy of my home, when I am alone. I will choose a CD based on my mood, stand in the center of the room, and just feel the music for a few moments before letting my body move, completely on its own, with no thought from me. There is such freedom of spirit when I close my eyes and feel my body move to the feeling of the music. Do I regret not going after my dream of becoming a dancer? No. It is still a dream deep inside me and when I am alone, in my house dancing, with my eyes closed, I am actually on stage, feeling the silent eyes of the audience move with me; their silence as loud as the music that has taken control of my body and soul. I am dancing for me and I am dancing for them. When my body stops along with the music and I open my eyes, I can still hear the applause ringing in my ears...