Well, I guess it is happening again.
"If I had to choose, I would choose you."
I had no idea what those words meant when said to me almost 2 years ago. It eventually became clear. And it was a big fat lie. She betrayed me.
Why do people find me so easy to betray?
I am in the middle of a brilliant game of mind fuck. I just would have never guessed who would be fucking with my mind. Again, I am kept in the dark while others know the score.
Fuck being in the dark.
I guess my friendship isn't worth the truth.
So, while my mind has been desperately trying to get out of the mind fuck, desperately trying to create its own answers, I think I have pieced it all together. This is all I have; my own answers right or wrong. And I, once again, come out the loser. I seem to be everyone's last priority to be honest with. Those around me are "protected" and I am fucked. Excellent. Thank you. Ouch.
In other news, I had a fantastic weekend. Saturday brought blue skies, upper 60's and wrist band afternoon at the Arkansas State Fair. Oh yes my friends, for one price you can ride the carnival rides over and over and over and over and over all afternoon. The key to this fun filled family afternoon is to get to the fair early, to avoid the late afternoon rush. We made it there at noon, when the one price wrist band started. The midway was almost empty. No pushy parents letting their kids cut in line, no strollers rammed into the back of my ankles, it was wonderful. The kids had almost 2 hours of continual riding with no waiting in line. As it started getting crowded we left the midway in search of food. Then walked through the kids barn, played a few games and called it a day. I took some fantastic pictures; maybe later I'll post a few.
Sunday, the gorgeous fall weather continued and it was off to the pumpkin patch to pick the perfect pumpkin for carving and to take a hayride. Again, wonderful happy day. Next weekend I'm going to make pumpkin stew with one of the pumpkins I picked. Yummmy.
At least I have my priorities straight. This makes me very very happy.
"If I had to choose, I would choose you."
I had no idea what those words meant when said to me almost 2 years ago. It eventually became clear. And it was a big fat lie. She betrayed me.
Why do people find me so easy to betray?
I am in the middle of a brilliant game of mind fuck. I just would have never guessed who would be fucking with my mind. Again, I am kept in the dark while others know the score.
Fuck being in the dark.
I guess my friendship isn't worth the truth.
So, while my mind has been desperately trying to get out of the mind fuck, desperately trying to create its own answers, I think I have pieced it all together. This is all I have; my own answers right or wrong. And I, once again, come out the loser. I seem to be everyone's last priority to be honest with. Those around me are "protected" and I am fucked. Excellent. Thank you. Ouch.
In other news, I had a fantastic weekend. Saturday brought blue skies, upper 60's and wrist band afternoon at the Arkansas State Fair. Oh yes my friends, for one price you can ride the carnival rides over and over and over and over and over all afternoon. The key to this fun filled family afternoon is to get to the fair early, to avoid the late afternoon rush. We made it there at noon, when the one price wrist band started. The midway was almost empty. No pushy parents letting their kids cut in line, no strollers rammed into the back of my ankles, it was wonderful. The kids had almost 2 hours of continual riding with no waiting in line. As it started getting crowded we left the midway in search of food. Then walked through the kids barn, played a few games and called it a day. I took some fantastic pictures; maybe later I'll post a few.
Sunday, the gorgeous fall weather continued and it was off to the pumpkin patch to pick the perfect pumpkin for carving and to take a hayride. Again, wonderful happy day. Next weekend I'm going to make pumpkin stew with one of the pumpkins I picked. Yummmy.
At least I have my priorities straight. This makes me very very happy.
VIEW 16 of 16 COMMENTS
braveart:
hmmm...i sense i great disturbance in the force.... 
redwinterroses:
lol! karama is a bitch! 