catculus

Thursday my English professor called me when I was at work to ask about my paper as he had not received one from me. He said that if I could get it to him 5pm on Sunday he would give me credit for it with a severe late penalty. Friday I stayed in the library doing research until it closed at 4:30 and then I had work until 9:30 and then my sister and I went shopping and after that I was really tired. Then, today I worked 3-10:30 and now I'm tired. Fuck. I mean, I should be working on it or I should plan to get up early and work on it but it all seems pretty pointless because how in the hell am I supposed to write an acceptable research paper that I haven't even started planning in time to have it to my teacher by 5pm?
I am so fucking lazy. I mean, I could've gotten that done but I didn't. I could still get it done, if I really cared, but I guess I don't. I mean, it's and F. This should freak me out. That nerd who can't bare to get anything below a B should really be freaking out right now. But it's still better than a year ago when I dropped all of my classes but one and then got an F in it.
But I guess I can't really compare this to a year ago.
And it's stupid to get an F in a class I was doing well in until about two weeks before it was over.
And it's stupid to be sitting here writing about it when I could either be trying to get my paper going or sleeping.
I don't know.
It is Sunday now, meaning I'll be in Washington two weeks from tomorrow and it's really hard to see anything before that. Even Christmas doesn't really matter and is just an annoying use of time because it is before December 29.
I am looking forward to that calculator I'm getting, though.