cassy

the bomb ass morcheeba song, that is NOT from the new album but is worth mentioning.
ah back to normal life now right? last weekend was my cloud 9, like a fantasy. everything went right. it's so funny josh and i have those "cute" problems, like where are we going to eat, or what movie are we going to see, no "real" problems. even when we lived together it was pretty much like that other than the family and ex boyfriend bullshit. fuck that bullshit into the ground, what a waste of energy that was.

i've already started to write about last weekend in another journal. on the plane ride on the way back from burlington i couldn't help but think about how badly i wanted to remember every detail. it's weird, i am a bit of a scatterbrain, so i always am so scared of forgetting details. anyhow, what i do is, i journal in a physical journal, and i really enjoy the fact that when i'm done with one, it's a permanent record of what's happened. not an internet one, not one i wrote for someone else, one i wrote for only me. and maybe one day, for josh.

this morning i'm downloading the new Morcheeba album called Blood Like Lemonade, and it's fuckin fantastic, i highly recommend it.

oh so more about last weekend, because it makes me smile to think about it. i bought a collar, well had one made, and wore it for the first time. i've never done anything like that for a guy before, and there was something really sweet and loving and giving about doing it. kind of like the ultimate gift. i had a small key ring made for him that is out of the same type of leather, and something about that smell continues to make him think about me in the collar all day long. he was telling me last night that the key ring is a tiny little reminder of me that he has with him always <3 yeah can we say swoon? he said it was on the work bench yesterday and the fan kept wafting the sweet leather smell towards him when he was working and he couldn't get me out of his head.

i have to say that man melts my heart in every way. and although there are tons of things we didn't do, on our list, there are tons that we did do. and hey it was only 2 days, but it was such a blessing, and we needed to have that time to reconnect physically. i can't kick a gift horse in the mouth, i'm fuckin blessed, and i'm happy.

i'm so in love with this man, that it makes me tear up to think of the way he makes my heart fill with joy and explode and overflow onto the two of us when our bodies are entertwined. i have to stop thinking about how i don't have that, because i DO have that, it's just not going to be right in front of me for awhile, but just like the wind, you don't have to see it to feel it.

i haven't unpacked yet. mostly because i think it'll bum me out some to put all that stuff away. this place is such a mess right now, omg. needs clothes put away, and organized and bathroom cleaned, and floor vaccuumed. oh maid, where are you now? lol. best 80.00 ever spent in life. lol.

maybe i'll put some crap away now instead of reminiscing for a few minutes <3

it's my birthday celebration at my folks today, should be fun. did i tell you guys that one of my best girlfriends, Misa and i have kinda been on the fritz, and she's coming today because when i was on my way to ohio, i kinda made up with her via email. it'll be the first time i've seen her in a few months so i'm happy about that. also, my kid will be there in all her splendor and glory, making me go swimming in a pool that is like 45 degrees. kmn. i'm actually glad parents got that pool up i could use some sun, just not on my face!!! no more freckles please kaithanxbi...

oh yea, so parents got me a 42inch flat screen tv, and dad and brother are going to install maybe tomorrow! i'm so stoked with a mount on the wall, and a blue ray player. seriously? that's a bit much isn't it?

ok.
i'm going to go be productive
have a great saturday my cats and kittens <3 xoxo, Cass.