Ok so, a few new things.
My sort of ex bing bonged me on msn and we chatted. Now this guy is the one who got away. Totally hot and irresistable to me, and too fucked up to have anything with at the time. So anyway, we're chatting and hes saying stuff like 'I'd give just about anything to be with you again' and 'I almost forgot how fucking hot you are', etc. Now hes finally grown up a bit and is willing to be open.... but i'm taken. And god hes hot. But I'm motherfucking engaged! I wont sacrifice my current relationship, but i think that whole conversation led to my more convoluted stress last night.
So we've almost bought a house now, we're through the home inspection.
We're also getting married in Africa in the fall.
The problem that I'm having is rearranging my thinking about money. I want to be responsible for my debt and him to be responsible for his. I tend to pay more and live a bit more cheaply and he lives a bit splashier paying less. Do I want to be working my ass off to pay off 10K of his debt after i pay of 5K of mine? I feel really selfish about it. I'm not sure if or how i should bring it up. Stuff is 'ours' now, thats just the way it works...
help!
My sort of ex bing bonged me on msn and we chatted. Now this guy is the one who got away. Totally hot and irresistable to me, and too fucked up to have anything with at the time. So anyway, we're chatting and hes saying stuff like 'I'd give just about anything to be with you again' and 'I almost forgot how fucking hot you are', etc. Now hes finally grown up a bit and is willing to be open.... but i'm taken. And god hes hot. But I'm motherfucking engaged! I wont sacrifice my current relationship, but i think that whole conversation led to my more convoluted stress last night.
So we've almost bought a house now, we're through the home inspection.
We're also getting married in Africa in the fall.
The problem that I'm having is rearranging my thinking about money. I want to be responsible for my debt and him to be responsible for his. I tend to pay more and live a bit more cheaply and he lives a bit splashier paying less. Do I want to be working my ass off to pay off 10K of his debt after i pay of 5K of mine? I feel really selfish about it. I'm not sure if or how i should bring it up. Stuff is 'ours' now, thats just the way it works...
help!
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You made your debt, he made his. If i were in your situation I'd feel better about everyone paying off their own debt, then going forward together, debt-free.
Sounds like he thinks you are the "one that got away", which is something for the ego anyway. I have only ever been considered "the one we're glad he left"
Anyway, thanks for your kind words about my comments in the Beaten... thread. Sometimes I feel a little out there and a little validation is always nice.
Kind of like being considered the one that got away!