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carebear

Long Island, NY

Member Since 2004

Followers 37 Following 61

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Thursday Jun 03, 2004

Jun 2, 2004
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ok i can't sleep it's 5:39 AM and i should be sleeping but for some reason i am not tired at all

what the hell is going on w/ me

i am so unmotivated to do anything....i haven't been working on any clothing....nor am i looking for a job to support my broke ass...i feel like i am floating to no where

i am in such a funk

i'm starting to hate my life again and that is never a good thing....don't get me wrong...the people in my life are great, it's just how i feel inside that's bugging me out... hard core

i feel like i have no direction going on ... i know i have to find a job but everything i come up with i just wouldn't fit into. meaning everything i have done in the past was different .... i'm more me now and that wouldn't work in the jobs i have done before and i don't feel that i should have to change just for a job. i don't think the way i look should matter to the preformance i can do at a job. i hate the fact that because i have tat's and piercings that certian jobs won't hire me ...meanwhile i am perfectly capable at doing them.

society SUCKS shit through a straw!!!!!

hyde:
I hear that . . . I <b>SO</b> hear that.

The reason I applied at the place I'm currently working is because they encourage self expression, although they also <i>demand</i> that their employees work insane hours without any compensation or overtime. I don't work in a sweat shop, I was cryptic in my journal because I don't want to let out too much information on what Im doing. The World Wide Web is a small world sometimes.

I've worked 70 hour weeks, over 36 days straight without a day off. They told me it's just expected and if I don't like it I could quit. I stayed as long as I did because it's the most money I ever made (not really that much) and I could look and dress however I want. The only condition was to work these crazy hours. Over time I realized that every hour over 40 my pay rate goes down. Ive worked over 1 months worth of work FOR FREE. When I choose not to stay Im penalized. If I call out sick after working 45 hours in 4 days they wanted me to work the weekend to make up missed time . . . missed time!?!?!?! I was friggin sick!!!!

Im sorry this is your journal not mine. My point is beware of companies who encourage self-expression, they might be like this company and figure youre not smart enough or tough enough to call them on their wrong doing. Or Im just jaded at the moment and Im realizing Im going to have to join in the job search and Ive got bright pink hair.

>:\
O
Jun 4, 2004

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