caput

It's like a distant memory lingering beneath layers of defenses.
I, Creating antibodies: rendering Me, immune.
Prognosis had once seemed bleak, the pain threatening to destroy me whole
sending my body into shock, toxic
Coma
I awake anew.
Alas, i've forgotten what it all meant to me before
Were it not for these ugly scars that riddle my frame, my mind, my soul
Were it not for the gentle palpitation of my fragile heart
I would never know that we even were
That we had existed.

I search endlessly for the moment before
those few seconds before any tragic ending
or beginning
whichever you prefer
And i find that where i had once said, but, i love you
is now,
I loved you

And now those words that had meant life before
are empty
vapid
They do not sustain me
Were for it not for my immune system
i would have drifted into the abyss
soon after becoming
your
distant memory.